aqilah23

2010-08-12T18:29:00.002+08:00

sori for not updating for so long!
totally forget about my blog, hehe..
idk wat to update, damn it..
hmm, yesterday first day of fasting month.. everything went well except tat i break it in e afternoon, hehe.. today oso sia, neva fast.. 10am alr go cafe to buy wafer..
mt teacher scold2, i still can ask 'cikgu tak puasa eh' haha..
then cikgu say nvm she dun scold me cause she say my wire got a bit loose, lucky ah..
after schl got sci ct, sure fail then slack2..

happy one mth for our frendship my ttm,haa! hope it last long..
i hate to be in a r/s, adr mataer mcm takde..
puas hati tak yah adr kan? heesh..
nvm2, as long as i have my 'daddy' n my child in my stomach can alr..hehe..
till here, nak buka then g 'terawih'..haha

2010-06-29T18:42:00.002+08:00

where should i start?hmm,
sunday went to seoul garden wif fam,food was so delicious but i ate a b9it only as i was full..
went off early to bbc to slack, went hm..
monday? schl's great i guess, a lot of change in teacher..
went to silat, was serious until e sparring time..
sori adilah, didn't accidentally kick u know..sori sori sori!
have to brush up on my kicking as it was too low..hmm,
today okay2.. both days after schl go slack until 6+..
mcm da biase sey..heesh, but i try not to slack tat often, due to some reason..
tmr training, sian..

I dun wanna lose my fren again, i really treasure them,
i'm so sori if i have done anything wrong to u guys,
u're e best, but y now we r like drifting apart?
can we be like last time.. pls..'

2010-06-26T12:58:00.003+08:00

ignore e pic, haha.. took after helping my neighbour mum, so yeah.. tired..
feel like updating my blog today..hehe.just soo happy..
yesterday something great happened..
early in e morning went to 'work', then after tat meet shuk they all at padang as thaikotai is having their match.. when i reached, gosh, was so piss off..
someone was there, i hate to c their faces .. i trust them so much but guess wat,
they can talk about me.. lean against e wall, they having their half time..
some of e ppl call me to sit at e pondok, okay then.. i sat opp them..funny huh? haha
then watch them jk ard everything.. faris came n sat nxt to me.. then talk to me(((;
first shy, but then okay alr.. then he's off to play.. they won , shuqun lost.. 14-2 i tink..
but was a great match..today oso if i not wrong they got match...not tired meh they all..
went hm to change, leaking..hee..then went back there, they all changing..
walk wif faris to bus stop then talk2 wif him, bus came i went to bb to slack..
walao,i slack till 8.30pm man.. parents neva call.. wee~
walk wif wan back hm, talk2 everything..
reach hm, phone flooded wif msg.. until 3am i was still bz msg-ing, wif HIM oso..hee..
2 more day to schl reopen, n still not ready.. hw not yet done,
i will miss him a lot, n my frens..

2010-06-11T21:29:00.002+08:00

kaykay, i update my sibei dead blog.. hee..
see tat photo? she's my silat fren, we 2 only gal.. haha..not includin e small2 ah..
something sad happen, haish..lazy to say..
is it hurting tat e guy u love is attached to someone else? like wtf right.
n he come n tell u e reason tat i prioritise my fren more than him..
leave me, few days after tat he is attached.. so i guess is not my fault huh..
if u dun love me alr, dun need to come up wif fxcking excuses.. it will only hurt me more..
i hate it to see ur face everytime i on e comp, but at some point, i love u too..
ppl say to ive chance to other ppl, but idk how..
i just dun want innocent ppl for me to get revenge on..
so i guess i follow wat my bro say, get over it then give ppl a chance..
okay ah, enough of tis..hmm, been slacking lately wif my frens..
quite fun luh, tmr they got match against youngstar ..good luck ah!
i miss a lot of ppl! kay luh, till here again..
maybe update soon, insyallah eh. hehe..
gonna sleep now, i know its early.. gonna meet toni at 10 to eat prata b4 going to c his match..
nite ppl!

2010-05-20T19:35:00.005+08:00

i've been thinking whether want to update or not..haha..
oh ya, heard tat teachers r going ard stalking ppl blog..
they shouldn't do tis right?? hu agree??
my blog, my privacy,my rights
been spending time after schl wif nhita lately since exam,
to some ppl, i'm not snatching nhita from u all kay.. dun misunderstand,
shall clear tis b4 anybody talk no sense..very fun n easy perosn to talk to, nhita.
results? hmm, not bad ah.. but i freaking angry tat i fail eng for sa1 paper..
i hope tat i pass overall cause i dun wanna drop to na..
happy tat i pass math, sci( even thoufgh 50+, paper was tough), mt ok2, lit, dnt(idk if i do miss out some of e subjects)currently having a headache n flu..idk how i get it..

I want how we used to be like last time,
going thru e thick n thin together,
loving me, caring for me, advicing me..
but now? wat happened? u can't always blame me for everything,
ppl tend to make mistake right..
i'm sori if i'm not e perfect gal u want..
if u want to leave me, okay then..
i can't force u to do wat i say..
we are only frens..
remember our promise tat u wanted us to be more than fren? after we r clear from everything..
i guess u have change ur mind ah? idk.. i tot u can help me to change my mindset tat not all guys r e same , but now? i still think n believe tat all guys r e same..
starting to believe in karma,

2010-05-09T09:28:00.002+08:00

sori for e long and dead blog.. lazy to update..
got back my phone last wk, n today i feel like i got back my phone last month..haha..
want to thank aishah, noraine, kun, saiful, lynn, salwah, nurin, Bryan and many more for cheering me up and helping me..i'm sori if i make u all worried..
i'm really very very sad as he broke up wif me, i'm scared tat my past is catching up on me..
went to go, mrs tan help me, thx for e advice.. went home, uncle took me.. rest2 etc..
major paper is nxt wk n e first day is alr sci, wth man.. i still got doubt bout it, how to take..
but i very happy cause i managed to finish up my revision paper for math 2009((:
asked for my tution fren n teacher for help..
ntg much to say, all i know is i miss him a lot.. today is mother's day..
Happy mother's day to all parents n i love u mum, thx for everything n persevering to guide me..

2010-04-24T19:20:00.004+08:00

can't believe it tat i am falling in love again..
tis time i am sure tat i really love him..i swear..
i am starting to think negative again..
only he can reassure my feelings tat he won't leave me..
both our phones are confiscated, mine is wif ms ang, collecting back in 5 more days..
looking forward to it but now not so much especially when his phone is being confiscated..
he got caught for some reasons from parents..dear, u told me not to isap again right?
then u also kay.. u must realise it's consequences when u do something..
i dun want to be separated from u again.. u told me tat u wish tat we are an item right?
i also want it to happen, when we are free from everything.. as each day past by,
my love for u is getting stronger n i miss u a lot..
everytime i log into fb, u r e first person tat i check.. every chance tat i have to talk to u,
i will cherish it especially when i couldn't contact u.. i hope u get ur phone as soon as possible.. i will never leave u, unless u want me too..
I still remember e first time we talk, then u leave me as im attached..
now u came back into my life, n i'm very happy tat i met someone like u..
someone whom i'm easy to talk to, always care n love me right?
If u r mine, i will neva let u go.. I want u to be my one n only last one..
kay2 enough of tis..

hmm, exams coming up so soon..mt paper 1 n 2, eng p1 n geo..
wah, geo got a lot to buck up on , topics are not fully covered n is like last minute..
guess i have to do self study.. i dun wanna flung, especially math n sci..
today first time i really concentrate during mendaki..
thx to e teachers, ur advice will be useful..
good luck to everyone!
i hate having sweaty palms! argh!

2010-04-17T20:25:00.003+08:00

wohoooo~ ask mum to buy me a earpierce..
thx ah, love her a lot..
exam coming in ard 1wk+ n i still concentrating on geo.
sci not tat much, but worst, math haven't practice a single thing..
tat time mr ong praise me very good cause i first time do work in class all by myself..haha
wonder how is going to be my day tmr..hmm..

Ppl hu have ntg better to do will start spamming other ppl blog,
commenting on others,
looking at their negative etc,
but do they ever look at ur ownself?
u r just e same as others..
thx ppl for helping me..
no nid entertain tis kind of ppl, just waste ur time only..
if they are not coward, they will put their name..

2010-04-14T21:18:00.002+08:00

went schl as usual wif salwah..
fun going to schl wif her(:
study2, blablabla..
got to know my relay team..
want my temp no, WALK OVER MY DEAD BODY N I WILL GIVE!
no1 can know, if hard to contact me. awwww too bad..
after schl went to clementi stadium wif nhita gawade, abdul, n some others..
skip e 10om event, decided not to run cause lazy..haha..
then went for 4x100m class..tot got cca, skali cancel...pity nhita..haha
ready to run, until lend zheng yi shoe skali teacher announce e event postpone to nxt wk..
argh! nvm, at least can go wif her nxt wk(:
today event only 4x1oom class..
last runner, skali nurin run towards me, i tot got baton, skali dun have..arghhhhh!!
e boys got sia..*jealous*our class came in 3rd..sori ah..
can come in 2nd, i half way go jog..hehe..
then got 1 sec 1 gal catch up, she very fast sia..
went to eat at bb mac, then go home wif tat short riyaas..hoho
took pic wif nhita , but she neva upload..sad sad..haha
1more wk+ to mid yr..n suprisingly i still haven't study..
have to buck up a lot..): stress sia..

2010-04-11T20:32:00.003+08:00

back posting again..
shall post a short post i guess..
thx to those hu is always there for me..
especially my bro n his member, cheryl, jia hui, kay n there r some others..
cut my hair just now, went to my fav aunty shop at jrg to cut(: bro say no diff..lol..
exam is starting in 2wks 3 days..still have not study anything..
argh! going to start studying from now! dun wanna flung my studies..
2wks 4 days to my phone collection..damn long!
hard to contact frens, herman have been whining..haha..
i have no mood for relationship so ya, dun bother asking me for std or patch..
I want to concentrate tis yr..

2010-04-02T10:05:00.003+08:00

( i miss my phone): as i can't contact him..)
I am really hating schl life!! schl is sooooooooo biased!
why do some ppl can take back their sim? my mum called but ms ang say can't..
why do some ppl teacher can confiscate less than 5wks? fuck sia!
schl is sooo boring, been crying lately, sleeping in class..how am i suppose to pass my mid yr?haish
yesterday after schl find mr tan to get e aem form..decided to join it due to some reason..hehs
then ms ang say i can't get my sim back i straight tear, too emotional i guess?
i will stay on like tis until i get my sim n phone back...
then decided not to go home, stayback in schl..waited for nurin..
then honeyystar came..talk2, jk2, eat..went outside GO to sit at e round table..
e teacher hu most ppl say look like bulldog, sori dun know his name, came to give honeyystar..
he asked her if she want e food not..she said yes..then he took out only a cake? me n her
tot tat e teacher will give us each one..lol..i said to e cher, wat if we get caught eatign outside canteen.."eat there eat there(pointing to e study corner)" he said..i was like , ' cher, canteen there only ley" haha..then he asked us to finish up quick..damn funny!
but still had a fun time wif honeyystar n nurin! ((:

tag replies:( first time not lazy to reply tag, haha)

Jaslyn. TJH: no worry aqilah, we'll always be here for you when you need us that's what friends are for alrights ? (: smile more, this ain't the aqilah i knew hur! stay strong babe!! love you
Jaslyn. TJH: AQILAH! 1st of april alr!!!! very quickly, u'll get ur phone back, no worries aites
To jaslyn, TJH: Thx a lot, i really appreciate it..yeah i know it's 1st april yesterday but it is still very long..last long wif him aite..

Priyah: Heyy.. haha, you & stella touch Benjamin! LOL
To priyah: haha, like tat only..hehe

amanda: sis!! (: the school like **** de , 5 wks long right ?? knn luh the school don't worry okay
to amanda: yeah i agree!

-: wow, ur recent picture is cute! Hahah ,passedby. Takecares (:
to -: thx ah, nxt time tag ur name kay..

DES :): Aqilah , cheerup laa okay ? (: Dont cry alr ... ):
To des: hmm, okay thx..i'll try..but it's hard..

psb: cheerup! smiles (:
to psb: thx(: tag ur name nxt time hor..

2010-03-26T22:01:00.003+08:00

I hate school! I hate life! I hate everything!
yesterday phone got confiscated..wah, 5wks? gonna die man..
schl sux, feel like quitting it..1 time confiscate , is 5 wks long? nonsense sia Bukit View!
cry like hell, went toilet to slash..after tis case, got another case..
for touching benjamin dick..lol..like tat so serious meh?
until e boys got caning, then we got suspension in schl..but quite fun ah..
at first ntg to do, so do work..then we tot recess same time, all get ready want go alr, skali
ms chua come say our recess at 11.30..wth, so long sia..
then she asked us sit in GO..we sit talk2..
we sit talk bout wat? dirty things..like no regret sia..hehe..
then she release us at ard 1+..talk2..went for training..
waiting till 29 april to collect my phone is damn long..
then mum lecture from 10+pm to about almost 12 i tink..cry2 again..

want to thank specially to Hazel, Cheryl, JIahui, melissa n fren,
n many more for comforting me yesterday..love u guys lots..

2010-03-21T19:54:00.002+08:00

[Idk what to update so this is all i have]
A friend is somebody
Who knows you and likes you
Exactly the way that you are.

Someone who's special
And so close in thought
That no distance can ever seem far.

A friend understands you
Without any words,
Stands by you
When nothing goes right.

And willingly talks
Over problems with you
Till they somehow
Just vanish from sight.

And whether you're neighbors
Or live miles apart,
A word from a friend gives a lift
To your heart and spirit.

2010-03-17T15:03:00.003+08:00

Currently chatting..
holiday is her! buyt i dun find it as a holiday..
holiday got hmwk? training? might as well go to schl as normal right..
monday went for training..
then go out wif love to far east to shop n night time went for silat..
i enjoy silat lesson more than my vb training..
I think u know y..tues rot at home..
today got muscle cramp so didn't went for training...
instd follow my mum shopping..haha..
damn tired n crowded man..

I have ntg to say alr..
to u or any1 else..
I know im in e wrong..
just blame me for everything kay..
I'm tired of myself..
even worst, everyone ard me..How i wish i didn't even step onto this tis world..
[taken during silat]

2010-03-10T20:49:00.001+08:00

I'm speechless..
Keep thinking bout wat u tink..
U'll never know my true feelings..
haish..not in mood to update a long post..

2010-03-09T16:24:00.003+08:00

sat nite ton..nxt morning ard 6+ my bro reminded me to go home n shower as i got e ocbc volunteer thing..thx aite..meet des at mac n mel ard 6.45..the thin start at 7.30..
reach there take everything n i got my shirt xs! wohoo~ happy sia..they say it's e last one..
went to do duty etc..first thing stand wrong position..paiseii sia..I kept asking des why no cyclist..end up really stand wrong place..the rest of e journey very boring..
finish ard 4+pm..ealier than wat we expected..when to lot 1 to eat n walk ard..
went home, shower n sleep..damn tired..
monday got class cheer..our class won first for sec 2 man! so happy(; ms tan is e best teacher ever..thx ms tan n for treating us pizza!
night time went for silat , very very fun(: i enjoy it I should say..
today I got no mood to do anything ): idk wat happen..and i've been super down lately..
maybe I know y..It's because of someone n myself maybe..
have been crying lately myself when no one is ard..damn it man..
I want to drink! hmm, maybe later (:
sad oso, ms tan is leaving tis wk): argh!

I do not know wats wrong wif me..
i do not know wat I did wrong to everyone..
I do not know if u do treasure our friendship or not..
All i know is that I am just a troublemaker right ? :')
fine , i will take e fact..
anyway to everyone whatever do is not right rite? thx ah..
u guys r e best ppl i've ever met..
I just don't feel like doing anything now..
super down n sad..
in my head now is just that i keep thinking is about dying..
If tis really happen, i'll be super happy man..
I bet no one will even shed a tear(:
and some ppl will get wat they want n there will be no moe frenship prob hor..
I do not need any counselling or anything anymore,
whatever ppl say bout treasuring to value life is ntg to me alr..
go in right come out left..

2010-03-03T09:10:00.004+08:00

Idk wat to post..haha..
e-learning today n yesterday..kinda boring!
hmm, yesterday went for cheer..should say quite fun cause i kept making a lot of noise...
hehe..after schl totally drenched wif nurin n jae..they r fun man(:
is like they make my day..head to wm to dry ourself n walk2...
went home as usual saw my neighbour..lol..

I wanna be ur someoene that could light up ur day,
I wanna be ur someone that could make u smile,
I wanna be ur someone that will always be there for u no matter wat happen,
I wanna be the person to catch u when u fall,
I wanna be that special person in ur life,
but i realise that i can't as u have move on ur life wif another person.
I regret breaking up wif u..
only if i can rewind time..
i know i can't always be like tis but i just can't help it especially wif e condition I am in):

2010-02-26T20:15:00.002+08:00

wohooo~
I'm like finally recovering..thx for those wishes(:
wed got tis bad stomacher..suddenly only..after schl i straight go home..
stomach was so pain tat everything i ate i vomited..heesh..i hate vomiting..
later ppl tot i pregnant..haha..
didn't take dnt test but told mr chua..he so kind luhh..he understand..
lucky got make up today...thurs didn't take e geo ct..at least got time to study..hehe..
today went schl as normal morning got skit..damn funny..my morning entertainment..haha..
after schl take e dnt test, not tat hard..then went for training..
I hate training a lot! i want to try n join outside volleyball..reason is i hate coach for some
reason some of e ppl really piss me off...( to some ppl, jgn terase eh)sori..but its a fact..
off to wm to eat my lunch..while walking, tis 'old lady' said to ask 'young lady, wat is tat in ur hand' i was holding, if u know luhh..then haven't (insert word) finish, i threw..
tat 'old lady' afterall is a teacher..i damn piss off wif her..so wat if she is a teacher..
she got no right over me! great, my afternoon is terrible..
I'm joining for sports heat thing..
4x100m n i tink 4x400m for cca..i dun want join both..n also 100m individual(just for fun)
maybe going to train..my stamina drop a lot n i hate it! ):

u txt e yesterday asking ' how r u'
i reply u n then u never reply me back..its been a month i guess since i last txt u..
n yesterday was e first time..
i really miss u..i only see u every sunday..n its only one time..
i do not really know wat is happenin to u..
i tried to forget u but i can't..
pls pls..do not txt me if u treat me like tis..
i know u have waited for me for 2yrs+ but i remember u sayin u r willing to wait for me..
where is e willingness??
when i said wat if u fall for other gal, u said no as u only love me..
fine, i believe u, but where is ur words..
i've fallen for ur tricks i guess...

2010-02-21T09:28:00.001+08:00

I AM FXCKING PISS OFF!!!!!!

2010-02-19T19:10:00.005+08:00

today otw home i saw my x man! almost cried..haish....
maybe not gonna update for a while...maybe mia? haha
got caught for scolding ppl..bla bla bla...
gonna update a proper post nxt time..
now no mood..very2 sad):

I am always out..
I purposely said in other language during vb, u want know y?
i want u to feel how left out i am when u speak in ur own language..
only a few photos r put..anyway, i am xtra hor (:
cheryl sis, thx for understanding me..i really appreciate it..
I feel much better when i talk to u..n des n some others oso..
I dun care wat u want to say to e others..
afterall, wat i do is always wrong(:
I am not scolding anyone or want to purposely hurt anyone,
pls dun get me wrong..I am really sori if i have done anything to u, i am very very sori..
i myself didn't expect it to happen..
but just remember, i will always be there for u..
talk to me when u need someone to talk to..
i'll always be there for u(:
I just want to blog out how I feel..
txt me if u know hu I am referring to..
i am just not myself lately..idk y..
I really want to forget e past n start a new, but its hard..haish..

2010-02-15T15:26:00.003+08:00

nice right? my mum made it for me for valentine's day..
look cheap right? no! u're wrong..its expensive okay..

just change my blogskin and song..hope u like it(:
life is getting more challenging for me...
after one prob is solve, another one come again..haish..
how i wish i wasn't even born or came to this world..
everything i wanted for or wish for is now gone, like a blow of a wind..
okay2, enough of this for now..mood currently fxcked up..
friday is like hell man..morning went to schl as usual..
recess time threw ice at nabil they all..got caught by this fucking sec 4 guy..
if he handsome nvm luhh..tis one face like dog sia..haha :D
they decided to admit to ms chua we were e one hu started it first cause we pity
them..then talk talk talk lor..
after tat got cny celebration..laugh2 then got caught by mdm geetha..
thx ah mgl for sabo-ing..U'RE E BEST TEACHER EVA tat i've came across..
just because of tis, can u believe tat me n yt must serve dc, 1h some more sia!
waste my time only..wanted to sent my hp for repair but then shop close alr..sad2..
wed confirm i sent for repair i guess, shit! just remember got vb..

sat went to tuition in e morning..purposely go late one..hehe..
after tat at ard 5+ follow my neighbour's mum to my neighbour bdae at downtown east chalet..
at first boring cause i didn't talk to anyone..after tat i talk2 wif my neighbour's fren..
should say they quite frenly but e gal ah, attitude like shit sia..heesh...
was supposed to go home tat night but then neva, cause was too engrossed slacking wif her
frens..didn't went home oso because i actually ton..
damn fun man, cause did things..hehe^^
at first eat then disturbed ppl...suddenly saw 'someone' i wasn't supposed to see, h_ _ _ _ _...
then we talk2...saw firrian n fam..the guys play poker..play until they bored...
neighbour treat us , ard 10 ppl 8 boys 2 gals, mcdonald cause hungry..
at tat time was ard 3+am..by 4+ alr, all sleepy...all type of position they sleep..haha
they went off at ard 8.30am..i shower..then wait to go to pasir ris park wif their fam...
her cuz e guy damn kind lor, ask if i want to eat mac or not, he treat..but i dun want..no mood..
me n my neighbour slept first when we reached, cannot tahan alr..
woke up saw her cuz e one ask me i want eat at mac not,.
he was e first one to talk n disturbed me..he even ask me if i want to ahem2 or not..
super kind sia he..then e bro said ' she thinking b4 saying a yes ' i was like of course ah...haha..
off home at ard 4+..her dad sent her cuz back first then us...overall, i enjoyed myself
especially e part we ton n talking to her guy cuz..

2010-02-06T18:11:00.003+08:00

Proud of my volleyball girls! even though we lost against Unity,
we actually did won Boon Lay sec..Jiayous girl! Hope nxt year competition we can keep it up
our standard n win more schl..dun be afraid or nervous okay? must relax n chill..

my life? same, a lot of things happen..
X is attach..I' not jealous, maybe a bit..hehe..but worst thing,he is attach to my ENEMY!
heesh..I really dun know wat to do alr..Everything I do is like all wrong!
I wanted to sound e gal, my X's std, but instead, I got scolded by him )':
I still remember wat he said ' Go and die luhh aqilah '
Idk wat to do..I try to forget u but it will come again out of a sudden..
I am always looking forward to Sunday where we can meet, but now?
Sunday is like hell to me..my bro say I deserve a better guy than u,
but I don't believe it...I kept denying wat my bro said bout u..
U said u dun mind waiting n u love me,
u said u are not like e rest,
I believe it,
U said everyhing, n I am stupid to believe it right?
now everything's gone n I lost him)':
do u know wat is my wish? not to lost any of my best fren or even my X,
and of course past my exam..
but now, it seem like everyting's gone...just with a blow of the wind..
I stop slashing alr, I promise u..but do u appreciate it?
we promise each other to stop smoking, but do you?
y must I stop when u haven't..
n thx eh, for everything..I can neva forget it..
Common test r coming n I still got a lot to buck up..
Monday is e first paper , which is english..lucky didn't have summary...
thursday is sci..nxt nxt nxt monday is math i tink , n thurs geo..
pls help me! I wanna sudy wif sum1...
I don't wanna flung all my subject, I want past n get wat i want in sec 3, streaming..
I really want concentrate, buck up n try not let obstacle get in my way..

what did I do wrong till u have to talk behind ur back..
I try to help u..
but do u see it..
I think u don't..
U only look at my selfishness right..
look at my negative side k, idk wat good it will make u..
I try to accept the way u r, but to me, its not easy..
Idk y..maybe u do know..
u go ur way n i go my way okay..

2010-01-28T16:07:00.002+08:00

hmm, wat should I update today? idk..haish..
up to u all want say wat about me eh..i dun care alr....
I am still hu I am..
monday got match wif unity..we lost...
friday match we will try our very best..dun let our training a waste k gals? (;
then best of all, i met syahidah for a while..(:
miss her man..she getting prettier n cuter...
U dun listen to wat other ppl say, just follow ur heart...n thx for e advice dear..
tues got slacking wif amanda...mr zul wrote our name n blablabla...
today got counselling..tis time a bit long..
after schl saw him again, minjie was like ' e teacher in pink shirt caught u tat time rite? '
I was like oh okay..when I saw him I walk away alone..tis time i cannot get caught cause
if not parents will be called..e others got caught..
went back at 2+..mum n dad txt me to go home..
mum say she say i know i slacking..then ask me go home if not she personally sent me go home..
sumting fishy is goig on sia..all i can do is let e anger, sadness, frustration by slashing...
will update a proper one later..not now..my mood fucking sad ):

2010-01-19T19:11:00.002+08:00

cut my hair recently..thin it, it's in e pic...tot e colour gone alr..
but haven't..dun care wat teacher gonna say bout my hair alr luh..
today is like ok2...eng lesson sux! boring n I dun understand a single ting..
mt do compo..I hate compo! rest I shall say not bad except fot lit..
Test N Common test r coming soon...I still got a lot to buck up..stress man!
dun wan drop to na obviously...I need sum1 to tutor me...any1..
but no matter wat, I STILL HATE SCHOOL! it sux like hell...
I just can't really still get along wif e ppl around me though they r kind...
I am not myself lately..Idk wats wrong wif me..
No matter how hard I try to forget u, u always appear in front of me..
watever I do to u, is wrong...I am selfish aite? I dun give a damn...
U like me, u stay wif me..if not, just leave me...I dun need u..I still have a lot of ppl out there..
I dun mind mixing wif e bad company, u want to know y? they r way better than e good one...
I may be good n bad at some times...But still I am hu I am..
Y must I complain u to other ppl..
Y must I be sad over it?
Y must I be sad when u dun talk to me..
Y?Y?Y?! argh! I am so stress... I feel like quiting or changing schl(:
I dun need any1 alr...only sadness for me..no matter hu I am wif...
What is love? what is relationship?
I've been through it many times but What is e real meaning of it?
sadness, happiness, problem etc...I still hate relationship!
U r e one hu put me in such situation...N i am e one hu is stupid to accept them..
vb training tmr...B gals having competition tmr..Good luck, all e best !(:

2010-01-15T19:45:00.004+08:00

" smile for everyting tat happened, it hide up ur sadness, preventing ppl from knowing.
cry it all out if u really can't hold it any longer n see who ask u y n hu is e one hu comfort u.
e person u expected a lot is not e not hu does tat ); " aqilah.
last post on 7 jan..now is 15 jan..
sori for not updating so long..really not in e mood...things happen a lot tis past few days..
first i kena one long lecture by my dad on wed night..i cry whole night non-stop..nxt day my
eyes freaking swollen..mum tot i sick cause i told her i got headache.. then she sent me to schl by taxi, aww, thx yaa...haha..reach school only i started tear a bit..heesh..
u want know wat my dad lecture me?
all is my discipline..first to take out my band on my leg, i pull out like tat in front of him,
then my attitude in class..thx to some idiot nerdy I kena sabo..i know hu..u dun tink idk okay..
u r a fucking bitch..eh, ur voice ppl say louder than me, still want complain i noisy..
when i noisy u quiet n want concentrate on ur studies, when i quiet u noisy...WTF sia!
say urself consellor only..best ah.. then he talk bout my phone bills..say my msg 1000+ every month..tat time reach 3000+ he keep quiet only..unlimited msg mah..i use ah..
say if I keep on like tis , he cut my pohne bill..nvm, by e time he cut my phone bill, i'll be in e hospital(: some more say, if my attitude bla bla bla neva change, if I not wrong i kena sent
to girls home...waa..super good sia my parents...hahahaha...
today my ear stud all kena confiscate my ms tan..ms ong ah say to her...
then mdm lee talk talk talk....but idk got effect not..hehe..
I plan to concentrate tis yr as its streaming yr as parents n teachers r saying i'm a smart girl etc2..as if lor..my bro was laughing when he heard tis...bad sia..haha..
today schl as normal only a bit piss off..then got training after schl, in ish..
I can't hit e ball over, only at parade square only..damn it man..boring i should say..
competition round e corner..its on 25 jan, vs unity sec..then 29 jan shuqun..i hope we can
win this two..Jiayous girls! run for every ball hor...be alert..
I saw him again..haishhhh...then slack2 wif hafiz, haiqul etc at street soccer...
they tell me e story bout sazly n them fight..funny sia! i was laughing like hell..

E time i saw u, i tot u were e right guy for me...
I waited..I did forget u..
But u came into my life again..
I did confess to u tat I like u...
End up u say tat u want to be ttm only wif me..
I asked u if u got any other ttm or not, u say no..
today i found out from my frens tat i'm not ur only ttm..
eh, pls luh..y must u lie to me..
I'm not a doll u can play like tat only..
u promise me tat u won't treat me like tis..but where is ur promise?
u didn't txt me e past few days, n ur reason is u lazy to txt me..haishhhh...
but i'm sure u're not lazy to txt other girl..u did say tat appearance doesn't matter..
but now it seems tat it does ah? I can't do anyting but just to let my tears roll down my cheeks...
my bro member told me tat u r not worth my tears but i just dun know y i am still crying
cause of u...
dun u feel e same as wat i'm feeling right now? i dun tink so...all u do is to look me on e outside..
i know i'm always happy, but look closer...n u know i'm not..
pls, do not appear or txt me out of nowhere..it alr hurts me a lot...
tis is e 2nd time i'm feeling like tis...is it because i'm fated like tis or god tinks tat I deserve a better guy?haish..I have to get over it..but how? its fucking hard man...

2010-01-07T19:31:00.002+08:00

went schl as normal past few days..after schl slack2..
our teacher for e subject tis yr sux sia...i hate it! but i love seating at e back(:
yesterday went for tragus piercing, then des pierce her ear again..
surprisingly, it's not pain at all!!!...
today when for training, n got cca awareness day...sux like hell!
coach train us, then he say tat if 10 balls neva do properly, he concentrate on C gals..
He really sia _1_ then i take my towel n walk out of e ish..half way i cried..
haishhhh... i cried like non-stop.. neva go in ish alr until ms ong n C gals came out..
But very malu sia, like everybody looking..thx to e C gals for comforting me(:
reason i cried was because i angry, fxcked n stress up..
i just hate vb since today..after tat i went to kfc wif hanisah, melissa n athirah to eat..

U neva stop loving me..
U neva stop waiting for me..
U neva stop giving up to get me..
U neva fail to cheer me up..
R e guy i'm finding for all tis while?
BUt i really hate relationship a lot, n i can't forget my past...

2009-12-29T22:27:00.004+08:00

went out today wif des n mel..
watch alvin n e chipmunk 2..super cute! e queue damn long can?
saw jessica..how coincident! we are watching e same show, same timing sia..
haha..went to eat at ljs..watched e 18 yr old virgin..wohoooo! nice..hehe...
before tat was talking to des, mel n jae about e show 40 yr old virgin, condom etc..
my voice until counter can hear..then e guy was laughing sia..
just an update bout wat happen past few days..

sat- went to rebond
sun- went to my auntie house then slack wif loves one
mon -slack..

thurs after vb training, got bbq..coach change from treating pizza to bbq..
choosing no 7 for my jersey(: sudden no...haha..
nxt monday schl open..damn it! I still got a lot of hmwk neva do..nvm..take e easy way out =P
friday celebrating glenna's bdae..watching The Fourth Kind..Dying to watch e show!
my lungs freaking pain sia! after I start back u know wat[close one to me knows it]...

U said u love me,
u said u understand me,
u said u will ask me for...
but instd i get my sadness..
I may not be e gal tat u r searching for,
but all I know is tat I really love u even though i"m wif another guy..
HOw I wish u feel how I felt...

2009-12-26T14:12:00.002+08:00

just gonna reply tag...update another time..not in e mood..haishhhhh...

Melissa: Just rmb , no matter what happens , you know we'll always be on your back to support you all the way ! (:
To melissa: aww, thx dear..I really do treasure u a lot as my bestie...U r always there when i need u, giving me advice, neva fail to make me smile(: thx yaaa..

hanisah: hey babe. relink! and rmbr, dont slash again on your wrist! we're her for you !
To hanisah:ohk, done relinking(: okay i won't..thx 4 always being there when i need u..I'll always be there for u..just txt me when u feel like talking to me, even when u r bored(:

jaslyn .TJH: tagtag,tag tag back, dun slit anym. All of us are here t share yr sorrows,tgt
To jaslyn .TJH: thx ! i miss u loads n e class..but still haven't done my hmwk):

'zatty: Eh, jambu! Haha^^ Kenal irfan budakk dunearn? (: Heh^^
To 'zatty: hey love..hehe..i know him..my abg angkat(: hope u two will be together =P

2009-12-22T15:32:00.001+08:00

justchange my blogskin to simply one..lazy want find..
yesterday went to sentosa wif them..play vb...etc..
more pics will upload later , if I remember..haha..
should say quite fun even though i'm kinda down..
went hm ard 5+ cause ntg better to do, then went to st soccer(:
home to shower n off to silat..not bad..
but worst of all my lungs hurt, having a bad headache..
lucky didn't spar..my spar really sux..heesh..

Idk wats wrong wif me..Its like everyting I do is wrong,
blaming myself for it, slashing for ntg,
hurting myself in wateva way I could...
I find tat falling in love really hurts especially when I know we can't be together,
n tat I can't forget my past..
I just want to be myself, wif my friends ard...
laugh at e joke they made...hang out wif them...
I want my life like how it used to be..
But eveyting happen alr, n i can't rewind it..haiz..
[gonna throw a party on christmas, can't wait to drink(:]
till here then...want shower off to st soccer..

[meaningful lyrics]
Lately I've been thinking 'bout wat i can do
I've been stressing to fall back in love with you
I'm so sorry that I couldn't follow through
But I can't go on this way
I've got to stop it babe
You've been wonderful in all that you can be
But it hurts when you say that you understand me
So believe me I, I am sorry I.. I am sorry I, I

I wanted you to be there when I fall
I wanted you to see me through it all
I wanted you to be the one I love
I wanted you, I wanted you
I wanted you to hold me in my sleep
I wanted you to show me what I need
I wanted you to know just how down deep
I wanted you, I wanted you

I've been pushing hard to open up the door
Trying to take us back to where we were before
But I'm done I just can't do this anymore
Cause we can't be mended
So let's stop pretending now
We've been walking round in circles for some time
And I think we should head for the finish line
So believe me I, I am sorry I.. I am sorry I, I

I wanted you to be there when I fall
I wanted you to see me through it all
I wanted you to be the one I love
I wanted you, I wanted you
I wanted you to hold me in my sleep
I wanted you to show me what I need
I wanted you to know just how down deep
I wanted you, I wanted you, yeah

I, I I'm so sorry baby but
I, I I've got to pack up and leave but
I, I'll always remember how we came close to be
And what I wanted to be
I wanted you baby
Oooooh Yeahh
I wanted you
I wanted, I wanted you

2009-12-20T22:29:00.002+08:00

back updating..
yesterday kendarat at my sis wedding..kinda boring..
but i wasn't lazy, unlike others..haha..its like i'm e only one hus doing everyting..
*skipskip*at 8+pm i sleep, sempat eh tdo? haha..head on table..woke up vision suddenly blur..
bang onto ppl..hehe..then okay alr, i help to pack..
One of the boys hu lepak near e place want my no..
first time going to 7 eleven, he fail to ask i walk away..
second time he called 'dek' then paiseii oso he walk away..my bro was like,
'laki ni ade bola ke tak sia?' then he maki abis2an..
I'm just not myself lately..haiz..
I wish there was just someone i could tell all my prob to, comfort me...
I wish I could rewind e past, do things tat I do, have my frens ard me..
but everyting change now..haiz...

as day past by, i miss u more n more..
e time i first saw u, talk to u, txt u..
idk if u're e nxt guy for me or not..
I'm just scared tat i let out my past revenge to u..
But I promise I won't since Ily..
I'm just waiting for u..
If u were not mean to be mine, i accept it ):

2009-12-13T14:54:00.005+08:00

yesterday went to bugis..walk ard..
went home early cause was damn crowded..forgot its weekend..hehe..
saw my fren, handsome sia...n he have grown taller...lol?haha
then went to meet girlF at st soccer..waited for her like dun know how long..
nvm2..at least i got entertainment there, amirul, azroy, toni n syaf kept disturbing them...huhu..
went to imm to eat..hungry sia..
chatting wif this guy for 3 days alr..but not now);
we tell our story to each other, his was like sooooo sad...
n he confess to me tat he like me? aww, so swit..haha..
but he doesn't want to std first cause of some reason..
hes reallly those kind of guy i've neva meet b4 n theres sumting addictive bout him tat make me
like him..Get well soon....
just feeling very sad n sick at the moment..

Y can't I forget my past?
Y can't I forget What u did to me?
Y can't u just accept me for hu i am?
Y? Y? Y? haiz...am i reminiscing???
pls, i want forget e past...only I can do it right?
I hate to wake up when u're e first ting i tink about):

2009-12-10T14:17:00.005+08:00

me n my one n only bestie, wani

'someone' is complaining to me for not updating my blog..haha
heres a short post..
went for vb training tis whole week...kinda fun i should say..
after training been going to mc to eat..i still haven't gain weight i guess..haha!
training stop for 2wks!
life's boring, wake up ard 2+ in e evening, shower, go st soccer n off home...
schl's on 4jan..its like only 3wks+ right? hate it man..have to dye my hair back..
but won't dye e whole hair..feel like quiting schl(:
haven't do my hmwk..only left wif lit, mt, sci, math, geo..anybody want help me?
i kinda lazy to think n do myself...hehe
planning wif hanisah n sum others..going to sentosa(:
e one tat are going are me, hanisah, athirah, amirah, stella..
u want go pls tell me...

U really are getting on my nerves..
Idk wat u r up to..
I dun mind wat u r doing to me..
cause afterall, tis is not my first time i'm getting hurt..
hurt me more if tat makes u happy..
I promise i won't get my bro n his member involve..
I'm always left out i guess in sum ways...
but my only person hu can cheer me up is SYAZWANI(:
been friends wif her for like more than 8yrs+(:
love her a lot, she's always there when i need her,she always listen to my prob,
never fail to give me advice..thx dear..

2009-12-04T21:19:00.006+08:00

.

[ nxt to me, is my bestie forever!]

updating my dead blog! haha..
went to town on thursday..quite fun ah..
let pics explain..
otw out penin i did sumting stupid sak..
all went up e escalator alr..i saw one button by e side, red colour..
my hand itchy, so guess wat i did? i went to press e button..e escalator stop n my fren jerk..haha..i didn't know it was e escalator stop button..lol can?! haha.. paiseii sia..
today he help me buy winner menthol..so kind(: hehe
i only .... 3 sticks cause promise alr..
today went to girlf house watch new moon..alice is cute n sweet..love her hate bella! haha..
she sent me hm[although our house near, hehe], in lift girlf grab me hard..
i shouted like kena robbed...hehe..alamak! i tot wat..got 1 big cockroach she scared..
i not scared k(:
slacking is my daily ting..
want go out must plan wif me first..lazy go out so far..

I won't wait for your msg or call..
it only hurt me more..u only msg me when u need me..
am i ur doll? stop giving me false hope..
when i wish u happy bdae, u only reply me 1 msg n tat is thx..tats all..
i got another one in my mind now..he is my x..but i just scared to patch back..
will it turn out like my previous relationship? i just dun know..
sgl is e best way right?
i just want my normal life back where i laugh n smile like how i used to be n stop lying to myself..

Tag reply[depend on my mood]:

Nafishyy: ohk...make sure u ok tau! hehe... hope we r close like last time again..
miss tat time...

Melissa N desiree: oh..thx..i dun care tat much alr bout him..so dun wori..
guys r all e same..none ever change!looking forward to tmr..do hmwk..haha..
I know it sound weird...but i want finish up my hmwk!

syahidah: ok dear! i will txt u..u oso make sure tau(:

viona: hie love!(: miss u! looking forward to tues..

cheryl: hie there..

2009-11-26T19:56:00.005+08:00

heylo! haha..
mood currently fucked up..all i ting in my mind is to *****..
haiz..bro gang all want me stop so max is 5 sia...
i want buy! sum1 help me buy pls!
todae went to bugis to find my shirt for tmr..
got tis shirt not bad ah..
life w/o going to e st soccer sux ! haha..seriously saying..
ppl there really make my day even when i'm down..
I want my phone back! its alr 1wk n 1 day my phone still pending for repair):
I won't go out w/o it , only slacking i guess..
so ya, dun bother asking me to go out until i get my phone alr..
i got tis bad fucking sweaty palms! _1_

I miss him! hes not been contacting me , chatting in msn n asking me to slack):
haiz..I guess i won't want std for now..
sumting really scares me...past few days sumting happen..
dun bother to ask y cause i won't be telling..
U really pisses me off..

if a guy dun like u alr, let it be...
dun expect e guy to like u when u urself dun even want to accept..
so make ur choice...accept or reject? cause once u lost it, u can't expect him to like u
anymore...

2009-11-18T21:22:00.002+08:00

idk wat to update..
just random ah..
monday tuesday my psle religious exam..not bad afterall, all last min study..hehe..
monday after tat when to celebrate des bdae..quite fun..out of 10 i give 5..
past few days been doing e same ting..slacking at st soccer..love to see ppl playing soccer...
some play very funny;D lol..I go st soccer oso got another job..look around..haha...
i just dunno wat to do, no plan during hol..
ppl r telling me tat they like me since i e day i go st soccer-.- wth!
I just dun want to be in a relationship now luhh...
even i didn't ans my x when he ask for patch..
I'm just not ready n stil trauma..u know wat i meant..

Everytime i go out wif u, I know u look at me first.
wat i do is not right to ur eyes.
u just dun realise it when u hurt me yet u can deny.
how wonderful is tat.
there is onli 1 place for me to tell my prob to n tat is my 18th x i tink.
everybody is busy wif their own plan.haiz.
till here onli..dun want elaborate or anyting...
I just felt like a dog to u...

2009-11-15T19:21:00.003+08:00

idk wat to update..haha..
idk y now suddenly got prob sia..
pity them..but dun give up to solve e prob(:
sat went to bugis wif mum n sis..to shop...hehe..
didn't get wat i want but at least I got 2 shirt..thx to mum(:
todae went to play badminton wif my neighbour..then slack2 at st soccer..
she saw her 'guy'..i didn't..haha..no luhh..i meant my fren..he got soccer trial at marsiling sec
n guess wat? he got to e nxt round..pro right??
got tis guy name AMIRUL, he ah, very fun to disturb(: kept disturbing him especially his hair..
tmr got my religious exam sey..sian ah,...not gonna for training..sad..
after tat mush rush go meet des n melissa..want celebrate des bdae(:
tues maybe want go sentosa(:
till here then....

2009-11-12T20:01:00.003+08:00

[me n des]
hmm, lets rewind a little..
monday training was like hell..
did 15 round running n 80+ pumping i guess..
hate running now..haha..
tues went to des house to do hmwk..guai ah?haha
wednesday went for training..
tis time better, coach say no more punishment cause tis is alr e 3rd time practice formation..
i can say tat tis time formation is better than e previous one..
todae went to imm wif des n glenna..quite fun luhh..
then after tat slack at st soccer near my house..i love it man, looking at ppk play soccer(:
my x fell, his fren laugh then out of sudden his fren fall n we laugh like hell...hahaha...
nxt is my fren play soccer trying to tackle e ball from tis yuhua sec guy,
he said tis 'Yacoob, How are u' lol can? tat guy hu got e ball oso no comment...
tmr going penin wif my frens..they dunno how to go there so must follow-.-

Y must life turn out tis way..
all i want is to smile n laugh like i used to..
every night i cry , wondering wat tmr would be like..
All i want is my normal life back n maybe not ppl controlling it..
I'm sori if i neva accept tat guy cause i dun love him..
wats e use of accepting tat guy when i dun love him,
afterall, love matter..
Everyting I do doesn't make sense,
everyting I do is my fault
everyting I do make seems not right to u,
everyting I do make u cold towards me...
Idk wats wrong wif u..
CAn u tell me wats wrong wif me?wat r u unhappy about?!
I won't change fyi as I am who I am...

2009-11-04T21:29:00.003+08:00

just ct my hair yesterday..tat means i cut my fringe oso..my bro say i short fringe better..
but true luh..haha..then trim my hair a little..it was when i realise my hair like no colour again..
so i want go dye my hair again tmr after math remedial(:todae boring like hell..
met melissa n glenna..supposingly desiree to come..but she overslept..i tot wat happen onli..
scare me sia...e comp training sibeii boring! regretted cuming...but a bit fun..got sum1 spam yun ting blog..so went to help..cum to know onli nxt moment my blog kena spam..
meet e spammer at 4 at wm...he really cum wif e gang according to melissa...
can't believe it man...haha..
i should be there i guess..but i went off wif my fren...now still on e process of reading e book
'To Forget You by Low Kay Hwa' todae sure finish one..it took me just 3 daes to read(:
while reading, i'm attracted to tis few sentence
' because if both of us are to cry, i want to be e one who cries louder,
I want be e one who takes longer time to recover . I want to absorb all e sadness from u .
Why dun u disappear instead, so u will find another guy hu truly loves u . The utmost pain
in tis world is not breaking up wif u:it is remembering e love we once shared , yet there is no likelihood to revive tis love again . I dun remember e tears ; I onli remember e pain '
sweet rite? tats y I love e book by Low kay hwa so much..
tmr going math remedial n off to dye my hair again...friday got training..formation again...argh!
haha..dunno will be updating tis nxt few daes not...depend my mood n if not lazy ah..
idk oso y i got tis sudden urge to pierce e place below my lips..
my sis ,bro frens all working..hardworking sia..i oso feel like working..lol can? haha

I really dunno wat happen between us..
I accept u for hu u are..
but u alwaes piss me off by saying tings I dun like..
if u know bored or sumting, dun slack wif us...
tis is because i ..... n u dun...
we r way diff...u r way beautiful than me n u tend t get more attraction,
so jgn kembang ah bohsia..I still got a lot more frens outside..
1 go 10 come(:

2009-11-02T21:09:00.002+08:00

todae training ok2...morning met sean to take ebook i bought from him..
title to forget you by low kay hwa..my fav author(: u guys should read it man...
its about love love love..haha..training first trained ourself cause coach late...
but good luh(:then formation...i in main 6?captain? melissa? wtf..i dun want to be separated from her..if can i want her to be wif me all e time n we supporting each other..
melissa u sad?sori if u wasn't in..but i'll try talk to ms ong k?
after training went to watch Imagine that..tot it would be boring ..but fun sia..
start at 4.55 so compete wif desiree dj max first(:
movie going finish, tears started to drop..aww..haha..
went home wif des..

[sam asked me to update tis at my blog]
its about after our step it up which idk when..haha..
very de happy...our class got e overall champ ah?? idk..
but lucky..woohoo..after tat when to slack2 n eat at e bubbletea shop wif jialei,weichen, siwei
zheng yi,sam[sori if i miss any1 out]siwei started giving e idea of hiding jialei bag since its
on e table..guess where we hide it?damn smart place..haha..inside e bubbletea shop behind
e so called 'door' haha...jialei started to find it...n asking..idk hu also suddenly say nabil take-.-
lol..so we just continue e fun...was damn funny especially when siwei started to act..he act nabil put e bag on e table n run away..he started shouting 'Nabil! Nabil! dun run'
it looks real though...jialei paiseii alr i tink then say he cum n bring his gang to whack nabil..
he dun even know hu is nabil-.- lol...

I'm sori if i didn't mean my word..
i'm sori if i didn't want to patch back wif u..
i'm sori for wat happened to u in e past..
i'm sori if wateva i say is not right or hurt u..
i'm sori if i do does not make sense or is stupid..
but its me n i am hu i am..
if u dun like it, then i suggest u leave me...
i do not know really if i still love u or not...
cause love doesn't matter to me anymore...

2009-10-31T09:17:00.007+08:00

yes! school's finally over man...haha...
yesterday school was fun i guess..even though its just cleaning up classroom..
my job is to clean window n door..so i took e easiest job n tat is to clean e door(:
then after tat got an idea, since i'm done wif my job, went around smacking people butt using e wet rag..finish everyting alr, got report book...pass all subject but must becareful wif my eng..got 50+ -.- But wat i like most os my napfa result, I got GOLD! I tot i couldn't...
THX TO MELISSA for helping me wif my sit n reach..u're e best man.. after school go dye hair wif yt n des..mel tag along...while doing, yt damn funny..she kept saying tat wat if e colour neva cum out...haha..end up got..but she dun realise..
I oso^^ but des one did.. *jealous* haha
went home to change eat then out again to class bbq..stella damn pretty sia(: same goes to
e rest..then rain...
second time raining, cher said call it off..wah,was damn fxcked up..pay alr for food etc,etc
then want call it off..cause tat time drizzling n got lightning..went to walk2...then
call my mum say tat its call off, cher ask one if not i won't..
went to mc again cause idk hu say cher treat at mc..so join in e fun..haha..
i did sumting funny..dun wan tell =p later if not u all can't kip ur mouth shut..haha...
N ThX to mr nazri for treating us..total cost is $120+..wow!hes onli our co-form teacher but paying a big amount...wat bout e form teacher??haha
went home alone...

2009-10-28T21:54:00.004+08:00

hey peeps(:
sori for e previous short post..dun know wat to update..
a lot of tings happen to me lately...
ntg to update todae..sick after u know[fill in urself]
straight vomit sia):
school very boring tis past few days but lucky go home early at 12.05 then fri at 10.20 cause
got cleaning ting...sat my parent no nid cum cause mid year cum lar..yay!haha
schl yesterday like very fast sia...home room, then go counselling, 9,45 go for sci , math then recess..
after recess go home..but cannot go home during recess..stupid teachers hu go n guard e gate..
12+ dental appointment..very de fast..wei chen ah even more cute..i tink can becum e
dental assistant alr(:
after schl went jp eat lunch then walk2...
friday got class bbq at sam condo..from 5pm - 10pm..so shiok sia but again, confirm boring one...

I didn't know wat i did was all wrong...
ntg make sense..
everyting i did is wrong
everyting i say is wrong
Everyting i want is wrong
u dun have to live a lie
if u dun like e way i am, u can happily walk off on ur own..
Everyone says tat i dun nid u in my life, but wat is it until now?
i still am wif u..
abih yg kau msg org diam2 slalu nak elak daripada aku tu kenape??
tak payah nak sembunyi sape kau msg la..I myself know its hu..
tis is way i call fren?!wow! its damn amazing(:
walaupun aku tak suke kau, tapi aku tahan je tau ngan kau...
kau yg patut sedar diri..

2009-10-25T21:54:00.001+08:00

LOOKING at my phone every single hour, minute, seconds
waiting for ur msg ):

2009-10-22T21:30:00.007+08:00

sori 4 e dead blog..hah..
reason being lazy to update blog..
exam are over..now got e result alr..all subject except math n eng got 70+..
eng just pass but math fail..hope with my ca2 marks can pass..
[idk wat to update]mum keep asking me where am i if i haven't go home by 3+..
argh! irritating sia... recently slack2 wif my bro frens...
did a lot of interesting tings..haha...
todae went to school for fun cause just go see2 e basketball comp..
oso waiting bryan to help me buy sumting(:
i .... a lot of times within time..just not be a heavy.... can alr...
share wif yun ting..slack outside e school for a while b4 going home..
now got stomach pain..dun know because of .... or i neva eat...
can't wait for e hol...got a lot of plan[i guess]
gonna highlight, slack, hang out wif frens n bro,n many more...
can bet tat e class outing very boring..

2009-10-13T19:24:00.006+08:00

today was geo n math p1..
geo was ok2..I tink my hard work paid off as was concentrating on geo onli tis past few daes..hehe..
tmr sci n math p2..scared man...as I'm not tat good in tis 2 subject...
had a fight yesterday..u wan know how it happen..
it was when I started to hate u when u n des start talking n u was looking me at one point,
n there are also a lot more reason..U just dun remember it...pathetic man...
u not happy ??? cum settle wif me ah...1 on 1...I dun care how many frens u wan snatch away..
I still got plenty of frens outside...
N THEY ARE WAY BETTER THAN U! They do ting that I do n its easy to ask tings from them...
U just save ur msg for sum1 important n i know everyting now..
Its all reveal(: u tink i can't take ur attitude meh?I tahan onli u know. I do care is just tat its
not so much as urs.. Eh, how u know i love to tok crap n write letter onli ah???
hahahahah..tats right(: I love it so much..even toking bout u...n its not ridiculous tat i gt angry because of u getting to be a PSL...U just dun understand those ppl out there including the teachers...

THX TO CINDY N SIEW MUN FOR MAKING MY EVERYDAY SPECIAL N MAKING ME SMILE(: u're e best n everyting we tok bout any1 must kip it confidential between us hor...

[Afi]
I'm sori if u change because of me or anyting..
but i've long forgiven u,,
hmm, actually u neva bother or disturb me...
its just tat at tat time u jk around or anyting, it was at e wrong time...
Its ur life so enjoy it...Be wif the right frens(: hah..
n i'm just dusturbed by tis sentence'btw, if u think i was e 1 who wanted to disturb, u r dead

2009-10-10T22:21:00.004+08:00

*will not be updating so soon, internet spoilt
just went back from raye..boring..e last one we went was fun..
a lot of tings happened to me lately...just lazy to update..u wan know ask me myself or wait until
i update...

2009-10-09T17:22:00.005+08:00

Kahirul here..updating for her...
This is what she ask me to update for her...
' Each day is getting worst for me.First I got caught for slashing, inform parents.Go home kena lecture.Todae my mum asked me to go home straight after school everyday.Scold me, not toking to me.I can't stayback for no reason n If I got anyting on, must tell her.so sad sia.Y must life be like this for me.I wan my normal life back.Exam cuming very very near.How I wish there is sum1 who is alwaes wif me,hard n sweet times.But everyting changed now.Hes not e guy whom I know really now.I wish hes e guy in e past but I know it can neva happen.All I can is just wish n wish n hope it happen.But wat I get instead? Hurt n sadness.make new frens wof Cheryl.Shes really kind n she understand me.Desiree oso(:

U didn't mean it when u said sori.All I can do now is cry n cry n hope everyting end.N to afi, I dun mind if u wan to give me a favor in return.Just hurt me more.Add on to my sadness n i'll say that u're e best guy i've eva met.Thx 4 e advice.Its not useful at all'

To those ppl out there-->
Enough of huting my sis already?!?!?! U happy right she suffer?make her suffer more lar.Why don't those people who hate her so much, tell her directly to her face.Don't have to hide!If one day, she commit suicide or its not the real her,i'll neva forgive the person around her, ESPECIALLY THE ONES CLOSER TO HER.Why can't you all just leave her alone.Let her have her own life.Let her smile n not faking a smile just to cover everything up.I just don't understand you people.You have your own life, my sis have her own life also.Just live your way can?Stop bothering her already.

2009-10-03T13:38:00.003+08:00

just change blogskin n gonna make a short post..
yesterday last min one..haha..
success(: yesterday was mt paper 1 n 2..
just hope i pass can already..
sori , this past few daes lazy update blog..
I'm currently single(its for those ppl out there hu tot i'm attach)
sad sia, my bro say i will only get my freedom when i'm in sec 3...
so tat means if i want do anyting, must wait until sec 3..sian ah..
my life get better n better each day wif a lot of prob..
I just can't get along wif[insert name]
but thx to des 4 making my day better!
Update another time, wan go study 4 geo n he..

I'm attach to CINDY TAN!
u dare touch her, u'll know e consequences..
haha...[felt like a les, jk2]

2009-09-26T14:49:00.005+08:00

I love tis pic, i wif yan..

currently updating my blog at des house..
yesterday went raye wif my pri frens until late nite..gerek!
[I was e onli gal ^^]
when to our own house..
there are me, yan, amir, toni, syaf, akir, fiz, kid, iskandar n idk hu..4get..haha..
fun! I love it..Every house we went, we eat..
I onli ate at akir n idk hus house..e guys ate a lot siol..
my house last..ask mum order pizza,...Thx yaa(:
so kind until she order 4...eat n eat n eat..after tat my mum gave them ice-cream..
then off play bunga api near IS house at e playground..
I happily playing candles(: they play e whistling one, very noisy..
then took group photo n off home..
todae practice cha2 dance, but instead we slack a lot,..
I half way cry..U wan know y????
Ask me urself can?I dun wan update..Its confidential ..
N especially to toni , my bro n her gf(:, thx 4 cheering me up..

HOw could no1 realise wats wrong wif me?
when its damn obvious...
I cry because of[insert name]
I wish I could tell her wats wrong wif me, but i can't...
I dun wan her to be sad..
Just let me suffer alone can already..
I've suffer enough already..
How I wish everyting end ...

N B4 I 4get, I AM HU I AM!
IF U DUN LIKE ME, FUCK OFF!
cause I dun nid u anymore...
CAuse u r e one hu make me suffer n make me like tis..

2009-09-24T20:42:00.006+08:00

Wanted to change my blogskin, but unsuccessful, hah..
I really dun know wat happened sia..
Its like after one prob after another..
Thx to 'them'..
[today not ok]
first, i started my day wif overdosing....
nxt i very hyper in schl..
got lit test after schl, i hope i pass..
kena caught by ms chua for my fringe-.-
stayback play2..tmr got vocab test, still haven't study siol..
I can't even study in tis condition..Help me!
I love e song breathless(:
can't wait to go out tmr raye...

I have ntg wif u all already especially her..
I do not nid to ans ur qns as u'll know e ans urself..
Stop asking me..
Its my prob, n i didn't say I wan bring my bro cum down rite..
wats ur prob?! I dun even tell my bro tis kind of ting already,
if not..idk wat to say already..I'm not attach, I'm single ok! so dun misunderstand..
Stop worrying/care bout me..I know its all a lie tat u act..
I guess I have to stop loving u, no matter wat..
Loving u makes me hurt more...
U dun have to trust me anymore...
Just forget me as i'm just making u suffer more..
Thx 4 everyting u gave me;D

Tag replies:

[Lincoln] haha..not all express student study ok..a good example is me..jk2..
Thx..Keep on smiling like a hamtaro(:

[Yun ting] ohk, phew! relieved..How could I not sad..its like one after one..
wait, I dun sad, u dun sad oso ok? must smile like wat I alwaes see u in schl..U too cheer up (:

[Bryan] Yaa, very nice..no nid donate, donate to my ownself can already(:
I underage age wat..haha..

[syahidah] thx.. u too k..anyting tok to me;D
smilez(:

[desiree] ya, maybe so..thx 4 acc me todae, tmr n alwaes..smile alwaes..
good luck for ur end of year exam..

2009-09-22T19:43:00.013+08:00

Idk wat to update..haha..
hmm, school as normal[ i tink]..
*skip*
after school stayback, do hmwk 4 a while then off play block catching..
I lose my patient man! cause of sumting..
then off to wm, walk2..then to sum where buy sum ting..hehs..
after tat met fren give her e sumting.. fxck her mother sia..
She blame me 4 teaching her how to *****..I didn't OK!
U ur ownself wan it so much..Stop asking me to buy 4 u already!
Her mother kol me -.- Idk wat to do already..
Everyting I do all wrong..
everyting I say all wrong...
Everyone I be wif, trying to put e blame on me..
FINE! If u wan me suffer tat much, put everyting u wan me to suffer on me,
N if I'm sick , crazy or slash uncontrollably, dun blame me..
Blame ur ownself 4 putting me into tis!

Eh, If u dun like me, tell rite in my face luhh!!!
dun nid hide behind my back n talk wif others rite..
U n e rest all same..Neva change..

Thx abg for helping me..
I won't let u down or anyting..I'll listen to u n stay single[if I can](:
I know u care 4 me a lot than ur gf..but must be equal hor..
Thx to kak oso..

Thx to Des n Jia lei 4 acc me todae..
especially when going to buy sumting(:
It was so fun!
Thx to melissa oso...[i ntg say] u write at ur blog until I speechless, hehe]

Tag replies:

[Syahidah] Hey, thx a lot...I alwaes turn to my penknife when I have prob..
When I c e blood, It make me very satisfied..But i'll try my best not to turn to e penknife,
thx a lot...Idk how to thank u..I alwaes end up wif a smile, tapi ape yg i dpt smua e other way round..
my kwn rapat, sikit2 i say a bit, smua salah..pernah wonder? Me n her dun like each other tapi we r best frens..
weird kan..everytime I c her, fed up...but i tahan onli..hu will eva understand me other than u..
hope our frenship last long after wat we've been thru, e hard n sweet times together...

[Bryan] Hie, thx btw..Its worth it 4 me as I onli wan e blood to satisfy me..
Try sucking it even nicer..huhu..

[Melissa] Hey, thx a lot..I really appreciate it..no, i dun wan disfigured ur hand..
I might as well do at my own hand..

[Glenna n desiree] U know I can't stop slashing rite? its hard.. n to glenna, thx..u too des..

[Lincoln] Hey cutie..haha=X

[Afi] hey, Hes just my bestie ntg more ok..Wats wrong wif u?I do not keep in contact wif him ok..
happy? all my frens hu contact me, none of them I can share my prob wif..
wats e point of having hp then...

[hanisah] Thx, i'll try to txt u n share my prob..BUt i hardly sharee my prob wif any1, u know kan?? but 4 u, i will(: enjoy ur dae n treasure every single dae..

[Yun ting] I'll try not be sad.. n u oso! if u nid sum1 to tok to, i'll be here..
N wateva we tok will onli be between us(: sori if ur phone kena confiscated cause of me,
maybe it was e time i shout rite? U get spare phone n sim card , then can txt ur loved ones ;D

2009-09-17T20:20:00.009+08:00

yesterday cher said tat chalet will be at chevron, damn happy..
near my house..hoho..those hu go must pay $20 , then neva go oso must pay but $10..
every1 was like, WTF, y so expensive..sum say balance 4 herself-.-
I got sumting up my sleeve, especially nite then patrolling..
but sad, we cannot share room..argh! about 11 of us plan dun wan slip,
wan play n enjoy e whole nite..
ntg interesting happen in school tis past few daes..
all I know is I've not really been myself lately..
everyone tell me tat i've changed,
but the truth is i've just stop living my life their way..
I starting to do back e 'usual stuff'..including slashing..tis is not e worst tat I have slash..
N I'm sori to those I promise tat I won't slash, SORI especially to my bro n her gf..
Idk wat to do now already ): sum ppl just dun realise how much they have hurt me,
n yet they still hurt me..wat I do? U wan to give me back wat I did to u b4 or wat?!
fine! I accept it wif a heavy heart...

If u tink tat i'm e one hu influence u all tis, pls stay away from me..
If u tink tat i'm e one hu cause u into all tis prob, pls stay away from me..
If u wanna b close to him wif ur sum1, fxck away from my life first..
If u tink tat I betray u or talk behind u, just accept it[cause u r worth to be talking about]..
If u tink tat i' not e best one 4 u, just leave me alone..
[if u tink tis is referrring to u ,then u're rite(:]

Tags reply:

[Syahidah] Hey, thx dear..I know my frens r alwaes arn..
But tak smua..N I hardly tell my prob to ppl..
U too, smile alwaes..dun sad2..any prob, txt me..
I'll alwaes b there 4 u , remember tis(:

[Glenna] NO prob, its my pleasure;D

[Desiree] Satisfied wat?? u mean.. N thx 4 alwaes acc me yaa...
I'll treasure every moments that we spent our time together as bestie..

[Lincoln] hie..c'ya around in schoool..

[yun ting] hey..Link me up yaa??

2009-09-14T20:48:00.003+08:00

Idk wats wrong wif me tis past dew daes..
I've been crying when no one is around..even now..
Yesterday I cried cause I lost sum1 hu is important in my life..
I feel fxcking guilty..BUt I dun tink any1 knew it..except to sum whom i told..
Secondly is cause of my bestie...was damn happy tat he txt n reply me tis morning =]
todae in school ok2..*skip* after school practice cha2 dance, damn cool e steps..
got rose[i mean e flower] sum more..then play block catching..I damn noisy...hehe
mdm lee, organising class chalet..1 nite only..but I n sum others plan 1 chalet stay about 11 ppl..hoho..No nid slip cause I still nid to plan wif sum others to patronize around..
I onli in charge for water, gifts n patronising..not bad..
NO mood update already..Crying like hell...
[I nid sum1 to teach me sci, geo, lit wateva subject tat i'm weak in]

To[insert name]
Eh, Can't u just mind ur own business????!!!!!
U got ur std already..now wat u want?? U wan go n spread wat?? I std already..
GO n tell e whole world la...Fxck sia...I lost sum1 important already n now wat game u want
play wif me? I know u r quite close to him...
N to those hu hurt me n make me cry everydae , thx!
Can't u just wake up???!!! Wat u did to me now, I swear u'll get twice of it...

2009-09-11T19:27:00.006+08:00

[personal model, haha]

[enjoying, llove it(: ]

back updating at last..haha..
just came back from pasir ris..been going there for 2 daes like tat to mit bestie..
Was treated like doll first few daes..then now idk ok not..
monday went to esplanade wif my neighbour i tink...dun remember..hehs..
wed went to Ehub at Pasir Ris,'bestie' wan watch movie..his treat..
Was damn fxcked up..He moody n didn't tok to me at all...In e cinema, sat nxt to bestie..
damn swit n....[watched G-force]Dun really understand..haha..neither did him...
all bestie said was he concentrating on me....after tat went to marina..took bus..was sibeii long..
about 1h++ from pasir ris..My mood became bad to worst..first cause of a txt...
cried nearly to break fast, lost apetite n didn't eat..went hm at 10+..
thurs went to mit bestie at esplanade..supposingly to mit at 2.15 like tat..BUT he cb late..
around 2h..was walking here n there outside library n best, he never bother to tok wif me,
cause got his fren..sad sad...went hm at around 8+..
todae they suppose to mit at je at 9..but those idiot bois + bestie off hp..
asshole sia..hmm, ntg much...
hope to mit bestie again..I'll make sure we'll mit sum where near if he still care for me(:

2009-09-07T21:08:00.007+08:00

[credit to melissa(:]
yesterday went to get my shoes..
today acc my neighbour go send her phone for repair..
waited for like half an hour there all cause she dun believe her no cum out already cause
e ting show no tat one spoilt..haha..thx to me i go ask e person..hehe..
went to lot 1 meet melissa they all..took neoprint n
off to bugis..walk2..then walk all e way to esplanade from masjid sultan..far siol..
wan to know how i end up at masjid sultan, ask me..
at esplanade we went to library then to e roof ting...
got this 2 stupid guys came up to us..
ask myself wat happen[lazy to elaborate ah]
too tired..
Idk if got time do hmwk n revision or not sia..mon, wed,thurs, fri taken..
fri afta school plan to go home.. I'm bad at time management..argh!
change my blog song..first song thx to my bro's gf..she's e one hu introduce me(:

I will neva be able to like or even love guys..
they are all e same to me..
ntg will eva change my tinking..
so many tings i've went thru in my past relationship..
n i'm traumatized untill like tis is cause of me..
If i haven't accept then, i won't be like tis..

2009-09-04T19:24:00.003+08:00

Wednesday did went for vb..training outdoor..at last!
haha..serve first when coach came..My first few serve can't get over e net..
but e nxt few can..Tink i did about 7 b4 he asked ur to go for break..
after tat he spike we must receive e ball..I hate tis part!where he sumtimes give chance n spike nice2 one to sum ppl..There was 1 time, when it was my turn..e coach spike side ways...
I know he expect me to run for it but by e time I did tat, no time wat..He got brain not ah!!haha..
N sori to e C gals,because of me u all must do pumping when I dun nid to[n its my fault]SORI !

Thursday went for piercings again(: ntg much..
today didn't go for vb..reason? was sick of course..
can't concentrate in class e whole day cause my drowsiness was damn bad..
slept during sci lesson..thx Mrs Lim![for not waking me up, haha]

Thx melissa! u're e best..I will treasure every single day when i'm wif u..
This oso goes to desiree(:

[specially for melissa, n sum others]
When your sad and depressed,
I will be here to put a smile on your face.
When your angry and frustrated,
I will be here to calm you down.
When your hurt and in tears,
I will be here to wipe them away and mend the pain.
When your lonely and have no one,
I will be here to comfort you.
When your feeling unloved and unwanted,
I will be here to tell you how very important you are.
When your having a bad day and need to lash out,
I will be here to let you let off steam, you can yell at me.
When there is something on your mind that you need to say,
I will be here to listen and understand.
When your lost in confusion,
I will be here to help you figure things out.
When you feel like your going crazy,
I will be here to bring you back to sanity.
When you are so overwhelmed and need to get away,
I will be here with open arms so we can runaway together.
When your scared and frightened,
I will be here to protect you and make you feel safe.
When you are full of worries,
I will be here to worry with you.
I promise that I will always be here for my loved ones, today, tomorrow and forever!

2009-08-31T17:15:00.004+08:00

celebration in school was ok2..
after school met 'him'..
then off mit my fren at wm then to pri school...
it was fun at first ..saw all my fren there..
disturb2 pri
after tat go block lepak2 wif my pri frens..
e gals wan go buy food, didn't wan follow..lazy..
i tink otw there they tok sibei a lot of stuff bout me..
just wanna make it clear ok..
I dun flirt wif those guys ok..
U know already I dun get along wif gals tat much wat...
Easier to tok to guys..

To[insert name] ---> pri schl fren
I didn't flirt wif hueva luh..
I tok to ur guy cause u didn't even bother to tok to him..
U r e one hu flirt more than me sia!!!!!!!!!!
HOpe u get wat i mean...

Just can't wait after puase for raye..hehe..
got a lot of plan..wan go out wif my beloved frens(:

Idk wat got into me again): Everytime I try to get into a relationship, I fail..
When i'm not ready to go into a relationship, I force myself n now I regret..
Haiz..Advice ppl giving me r not tat helpful..
If ppl say I play his heart, Idc..
I will end all tis by changing school...N I mean it...
Say wat U want..
N I didn't take advantage of any1..NOT EVEN SEAN!

2009-08-29T11:46:00.003+08:00

Idk how long i've not been updating..sori ah..
hmm, tis week ok2..
I dun remember when i fight wif those bicthes from 1e3..
u wan know wat happen? a gal called 2 of my fren, 1 my bestie nerd..
then 1 gal fall..melissa clap..i was like shouting..
[melissa, its not ur fault hor]
e fucking venice keep staring at me, i stare at her...
U tink i scared wif u? cum ah..
u'll know soon wat u r going to get from me..haha..
n my class not a lot of nerd ok..
is 1E3 tat got a LOT of NERDS!

wednesday got vb..was fuckedtup man..
frist we train formation..then because of we neva run or take e ball, all do pumping..
then he stop..say all c girls form 1 line..I was like ok..
out of a sudden he say we have to sprint non-stop, sumting like shutter run,
but in a straight line..half way running, i cried.. feel like vomiting then i endure..
when they cum back fo pumping, i did wif them but then after tat i straight go to toilet..
melissa was like telling me tat after tat, e coach stop then was surprised..
Thx to C gals..love u lots...
special thx to kay,melissa n hanisah..

thursday i patch wif 'him'...
idk wat got into me really at first..mayb its because after my bro tok to me..
thx yaa..so swit of him to do tat..i own u a lot..n last long wif her..

friday sahur onli drink water..
hardly swallow my food...
end up e whole day neva fast..haha..stayback wif 'him' after school, cause I lazy go home..
didn't go vb..sick n lazy..saw onli 6 ppl turn up for it..
Sori ah[especially to hanisah n athirah]
fuck ! my phone, as in my sim card, not working properly..
no network coverage...now i can't sms anybody no even 'him'..sad...

2009-08-21T09:35:00.004+08:00

yesterday sad sad ):
i dun know wat came to me..
first went to school as normal...
then stayback after school do concept map for geosci...
it was actually e draft but then decided to make it e actual one cause I lazy want right again..
n my draft handwriting is super nice..lol...
while staying back a lot of tings happen..
Wat i love was 'he' wave at me 3 times..i kept on saying tat he wave at me until there was a time i stop, idk y..
then afi came wif ibrahim ask me nhita got tell me anyting..
actually ya..then act say i promised her already...
hehs..but neva..its just tat i dun trust him already..
N i oso enjoy talking to DESIREE n NHITA!
then off home..'they' talk a lot sia..
I hate tat part..
went home i cried n worst still, my mum scold me for ntg important...

All i just want , is his care..
N tink first wat he wan to say before saying it out...
I hate natural..
If u not happy n dun like it,
go n find another gal..
I totally try to forget u, but I fail..
U may know e reason...

2009-08-16T13:17:00.005+08:00

no mood to update but will still update ..
yesterday went to lot 1 to do e ve project..
managed to finish..bought tis friendship band tat we wore all on e leg..
same colour..saw afi n arif..
tok2 half way I just walk off..sori...
acc my neighbour to her fren's bdae..
got bbq near her house...I onli drink..haha..
E bdae gal n sum ppl out of a sudden guess my age...
was damn shocked..guess wat ? 95% of e ppl there guess my age 16+ even until ite age..
Do i look tat old? no wat..lol..onli 1 guess it correctly..They say it was because of my height
[cause I taller than tis 2 sec 4 gal , sec 2 n sec 3 guy] n e way I dress...
went home around 8+..reach home at 9.30pm..its not late actually to me...
was locked outside[took advantage to lepak again] cause I love to tell my parents last min tings especially lepak..
she nag2, start ignoring me etc..me? i keep telling myself I got no parents etc..
Got a lot of misunderstanding now.. N no1 can eva cheer me up! ):
Guess I will suffer n hurt myself for e rest of my life...

2009-08-14T20:45:00.005+08:00

I fucking hate todae!First was my whole body aching n I hardly run..The rest...DUn wan say..
School as normal...
then assembly in class..
MGL say wan tok to me..first she call me n a few students out..
tats cause of attire..
i look so neat=X haha..she say my fringe n socks...she start to say about the skirt then i went
"I didn't fold my skirt wat" n i even showed her..
She call me n glenna out..say we tok a lot..eh hello..the others oso tok a lot wat!
y must pick on us-.-
then she tok to me alone..dangerous siol..*yawn*
she start off wif my attitude..then my blog..
I hate tis part..i didn't expect she knew my blog..then after tat she say, i spent dun know how many hours on chatting..i onli spent like 2h-3h lor..tat one oso i neva chat...
talk talk talk..she oso got say sum 3E students hu know me say they everytime c me outside la..
wat la..I tell u all ah, i neca interfere ur prob, u dun interfere mine! she wan put spy..lol..
put spy oso won't change me la..
I AM WHO I AM!
then she say i got bf..i say no..idk wat she meant by tat..oh, i tink wat she meant was i got a lot of outside boy 'friends' (: but ok wat..rather than no frens..
n 1 more ting, she tok like wan cry..hehe..

After schl got vb..first time e C gals set up e net like no1 help like tat..
when i wan to put e ting in, i hurt myself..
todae didn't do pumping at all..yay! then did last training..receiving..i should say i ok2 but kept diving 4 e ball..not using the diving method..hehe..
free spiking..i got hit on the face..pain..i tink got slight blood..put plaster..
neva tok a lot..it was like I got 2 injuries in one day n in 1 training sey..

2009-08-12T19:15:00.002+08:00

todae i was mad! kept saying 'Haiqul is a jerk' 4 more than 100 times..
but there is meaning behind all this..
thx melissa, glenna n desiree 4 being there 4 me..
u gals r e best!
sci ok2..but geo sux..
i smile oso e cher ask me wipe tat smile off my face _1_
training sux man especially when e coach take...
i got scolded like dun know how many times lor..
fuck sia..tis school vb sux!!!

2009-08-08T19:12:00.004+08:00

back updating again..
sori to my usual readers..neva been updating 4 3 days..
hmm, thurs went school as normal..
dun remember wat happen..haha..
fri, which was yesterday, we was release at 10.30..best sia..
txt des during class time saying i hate 2 person ah..
then she saw...she went toilet..i decided to go home n slack wif my usual frens...
but she came running after me..thx ya..
went wm wif narinpal, dhiri, ,melissa, glenna, desiree,benson n his 2 frens..
we watch G.I Joe...e show quite nice i should say..went in e cinema already start..evertime like tat if watch at wm..saw jerwin n his frens..
i hate ******..hes a jerk..cause of him i cried half way thru e movie..
after tat lepak wif my fren..

To melissa:
thx yaa for everyting...cheering me up when i cried..
honestly, at first i txt desiree tat i hate u n u know e sum1 ah..
but pls dun get it wrong..i dun hate u at all..
u know its because of wat rite..i fucking hate it when she tok to u..sum more i dun understand sey..hope u get wat i'm trying to say...but..
u're e best after all!any prob,
dun feel shy to tok to me k..i'll alwaes listen n give u advice...
To 'sum1':
if u know tat i referring to u, then tats good(: huahuahua...
eh, idk wat u r up to by txting ppl ask..u know ah..
y can't u realise it for urself wat is needed 4 u to change..
onli u urself know ok..
dun act wan slash etc luh..u wan slash, at least slash properly luhhh!
dun use table cover -,-
n oh ya, tok at least tok in eng can??
i didn't mean to write bout u here but i have to i guess..
To aishah:
hey gal, thx yaa..
even we r not tat close in school, but at least say hi k..hehe..
umm, anyting just thx me..i'll alwaes be here for u(:

Ur words r plain ntg,
u said once tat u accept me 4 hueva i am..
but u didn't..u said u wan patch, then e nxt moment my fren ask u,
u said u dun wan cause of my attitude..
ok ok..wat u wan me admit huh???!
i know my attitude sux ok..
but look at urself first 4 wat u did to me after all..
oh, i know y u said all tat..
is it because of those 1N bitches ah??
[hanisah, athirah n sum others , tis is not referring to u, i hope u know hu i referring to]
they influenced u ah?so, not i alone was easily influenced by others, but u too..
i hate u! u're a jerk..
ur words r plain ntg...
when i slack wif u, u said tings..
but do u even realise wat u r saying..i wanted to cry but i managed to control..
haiz..u r also e same as e others..
thx a lot to those u have successfully hurt me!
but tis does not mean that i won't win e nxt time...just wait n c..
in every game, there is alwaes a loser..n now its me..
but i will get up n get back on u double e pain n suffer i got from u all...

2009-08-05T12:24:00.002+08:00

i'm bored man now!
i miss vb training..
yesterday break up wif him cause of sum bitches!
kalau perasan tu la die...
i really dun wanna break wif u, but tis is for your own good, haiqul...
thx 4 everyting u gave me..i was happy onli 4 a while when i was wif u but not e whole
time when i was wif u..
If i have a chance, i do wan patch up wif u..but idk it will happen not...haiz..
n hanisah, thx a lot 4 everyting ! i own u sumting..

[Thx to Hanisah]
1. Are you single or attached ?currently single, just break

2.Do you have a person you like ? nope

3. What is the name of the person that you're in love with ?♥♥ haiqul (:

4.If the person you love and your mum dropped into the sea , who will you save ?♥♥ i will drop together wif them, hehe

5.Have you ever hugged someone before?♥♥ Yes .

6.Do you love your parents?♥♥ umm, ok ok ah..

7.Will you hug the one you love?♥obviously luh..

8.Are you willing to do anything for your boyfriend/girlfriend?It depends lor..

9.Are you jealous now? not really..

10.Who is the last person that messaged you?♥♥ My bro(:
11.Who is your clique?Er, don't know..

12.Do you want babies in future?♥♥ mayb..

13.Do you prefer Macdonald,KFC,Long John Sliver,Burger King or coffee shop?
Long John silver

14.Do you sniff glue ?No .

15.Do you smoke ?quit liao..

16.If your boyfriend/girlfriend is a 2-timer , what will you do ? will ask for break or tok wif him..

17. Which CCA are you in now ? Volleyball..

18.If you're rich, what'll you do ?i will buy stupid stuff tat can hurt me/go shopping

19.If the one you're in love with, held your hand, what'll you do ?Smile;D

20. If the one you love, reject you, what'll you do ?will say to myself tat everyting happen for a reason n if 1 go 10 cum..haha..

21.What is your favourite cartoon character/s ?♥♥idk

22.Friendship or Love ?♥♥ Both

23.Cookie monster or Elmo ?Cookie Monster

24.Are you using a laptop or computer ? Computer , sumtimes laptop

25.Do you like lollipop ?♥♥ yes ! Yes!

26.Do you have a diary ?nope , lazy to write

27.There's an admirer of yours and he won't die heart , what'll you do ?
????

28.If you quarrel with your boyfriend/girlfriend and he/she wants to break , what'll you do?
I will ask him y first..then if tats wat he want, i will have to b strong n let him go..
just like now..but i'm e one hu ask for break-.-

29. Are you blur ? sometimes i guess

30.If you can have your hair dyed, what colour do you want it to be? brown (:

31. Who is the last person you chatted in your MSN? hafiz, my bro fren.

32.How many boys/girls have you beaten before?i guess a lot..hehs..

33.If your boyfriend/girlfriend don't love you anymore , what'll you do ?
I will let him go obviously.. 'LOve cannot be force'

34. What school are you in?Bukit view sec

35. Tag 10 besties or friends to do this quiz :
Athirah(:
Nafisah(:
Melissa(:
Mandy(:
Afi(:
Hui Voon(:
Glenna(:
Desiree(:
Stella(:

AND THE ONES THAT I'VE LINK!(:

2009-08-04T11:36:00.006+08:00

not privating my blog already..due to sum reason..
idk how long i've not been posting..
hmm, reason because i lazy n no mood..
monday was our anni..he remember but neva wish..sad ): hmm, thx hanisah 4 e wish!
tis past few daes my mood ah, u know..
haiz..all thx to e ppl around me..
yesterday have been crying,ok, almost everydae ah..
first cause i ask my 'fren',dun wan say her name..i ask her y rose kept asking me
if i break wif haiqul already not..
she sent me tis msg in mly ah..later i translate 4 u guys..
'because ppl tak suke u st8 ngan haiqul ltr ppl tot u st8 wif hym tapi nak gtl2
ngan jntn lain.tats y if u alwaes near us we try 2 flirt wif haiqul 2 make u jealous'
it say tata ppl dun like me st8 wif haiqul cause later ppl tot i st8 wif him wan to like flirt
wif other guys.then e rest u can read ah..
eh hello those bitches out there hu did/say tis, i'm not those kind of gal ok..
i'' make sure u get back double of wat u all bitches did to me..hahaha..
i std wif haiqul cause i love him u idiots out there!
to those ppl out there especially melissa n e rest, thx 4 bearing wif my moodswing in schl sumtimes yaa..u're e best..
todae during math lesson i suddenly had tis bad headache..
went home..ms gopal tot i everytime go hm...where got sia..tis one first time ley..
haiyo..then ask me ms chua got tok to me la, neva siol..she tok to class during lit lesson got ah..hehe..
mum fetch me..walk out..tok take bus hm..but no, my mum boss was waiting for us outside e school in his car.. wow! my mum boss good sia! thx yaa!!!
went doct got 2 dae mc..todae n tmr..lucky ah..if not can die of boredom at home siol..
fri got national day celeb..must wear red & white..compulsory not ah?after tat, going lepak i tink but dun know wif hu yet..sat going out wif desiree n melissa going watch G.I Joe..
dying wan watch...haha..now resting..till here onli..

2009-07-31T18:55:00.001+08:00

I'm privating my blog..
so yaa..leave ur email at my tagboard k..
i'm gonna to private it in 2 daes time or mayb tmr..

2009-07-30T17:32:00.004+08:00

todae almost late for school sey..haha..
met him n sean near e staircase near my class..
thx sean for bringing him up..end up oso neva tok wat we were supposed to lor..haha..
sean, dun read my msg to him lei..pls..
thx!he said i love u..honestly, its hard to believe it lor..haiz..
wei chen, thx 4 giving me e bdae present just now..love it man..(:
will use it asap..start off day wif math re-test..can use txtbk n calculator sia..
then sci went to lab..lit lecture boring to e max...suddenly i stomach ache..damn pain..
eng lesson i rest..i oso slept..hehe..then got few ppl walk past class...dun know hu..hehe...
went to jp even though i'm sick...so i endure..
I didn't even get a single txt or kol from him ):

2009-07-28T16:35:00.004+08:00

went school as normal..
reached class listen to music as normal...
phone+ipod on table..
then mgl came in..scare me..she saw then dunno say wat ah..
*skip*
recess, moodswing..melissa told me my std toking to e [insert name]l i hate e most..
wan know hu?I.....
fill up yourself..
BASTARD SIA!i throw my bottle on e table..
then e lemon tea spill out a little on melissa..
At first she angry..then neva..
Melissa, thx 4 alwaes being there 4 me..
going thru e hard times wif me was hard rite all tis while?
especially bearing wif my moodswing..sori yaa..
went back class 4 eng then sleep i tink, rest my head on table as not feeling well..
Shit!tmr got math test sia..hope i pass especially in tis kind of mood..
later then study..

I onli love u..
Do u realise it?
every time i ask u if ur love is true for me or not, u said ya..
but i dun believe..i wan PROOF!not words..
During recess, u was in front of [insert name]
i fucking angry sia!!!!!!!!!
Did u realise me when i was angry?
....when i'm sad?
....when i nid u?
.....wat i'm going thru?
i didn't tell u all tis while my prob..
u wan know y?
its because i'm scared everytime i tell u, u either said 'oh' or 'jgn gini la syg[dun like tis la, darling'..
wat my bro said was true overall..
If I std wif a sec 1/2 guy, they dun care tat much(even though neva std wif sec 2 b4,
but i'm sure its e same)..
haiz): wat to do..
crying n slashing soon..i wan change schl!
Thx to everyone..

Oh ya, to sean:
i dun care tat much u wan to be wif hueva..
all i know tat i'm not gonna fall for ur sweet talk again..
as i said to u, "ONE WORD SORI CAN'T MAKE UP EVERYTHING!"

To[insert name]
eh bastard!
u say i can't tok to ur bf rite?
then dun tok to mine luh..
nabeii sia..
u wan play timer ah?
soon everything will be reveal u bitch!

2009-07-27T15:25:00.007+08:00

Happy Bdae in advance to MANDY!
may ur wish all cum true;D

Eh, BASTARD LA SIA!!!!
U SAY UR OWN SELF I CANNOT TOK TO UR BF,
THEN DUN TOK TO MINE LA BITCH!
WALK BEHIND HIM JUST NOW..
I ANGRY ASSHOLE!!!!

went to bugis change my MP4..
went back by mrt..stand all e way..suddenly, theres a spark between a guy n me..
then i look back ah..kept looking at each other..when his path is not covered, he show his fren..
paiseii sia..want alight already..he act wan walk towards me but then he wave first..
i ignore..hahaha..i nid to recruit ppl into my bro gang..
my bro bastard[sori ah abg]..he say i very...[u know ah]..
until can attract guys..lol..

2009-07-26T10:47:00.003+08:00

Went out yesterday nite..
to celebrate by belated bdae wif my bro n his frens..
Thx to my bro gf 4 e Hp socks ting n e shirt(:
did drink..i 4get sia..if i drink too much , my stomach condition worsen
n tat includes those acidic drinks..i dun care!
I really dun know wat got into me tis past few days really..
extremely sad cause of sumting..
n its not just 1 ting..its more than tat..
I really fucking hate tis feeling..
Thx to those hus alwaes here for me..
Hope tmr would b a great day for me..
no mood update..

To arif:
SOri bout wat happened yesterday..
didn't mean to..
i shall not slack wif guys again..
SORI!

To sean:
Since u have been reading my blog,
I want to tell u tat i hate u just like how i hate shahirah n another person..
I hate guys hu dun mean their word..
Starting from todae, u txt or call me,
I would not ans it..no matter how many times u call me..
I plan wif him one..e no tat txt u actually e person is ot a girl but instead its a guy..

2009-07-24T19:19:00.002+08:00

todae boring2 like hell..
everydae oso same...haha..
went for vb trainig in e afternoon...
didn't expect it turn out e way i unexpected..hehe..
but at least good no push up(:
first do agility training ah??idk luh..
i can't..but after a few times ok liao..
coach said tat chop chop give him 2 sets then can forget bout e rest of e sets
only if e ball neva drop..
did as normal..i drop e ball twice i tink..then e senior was like..u know..
i almost cried because of tat?! but i managed to control(:
i find e *****[not bitch hor] tis yr batch bad sia..
got training tee n off to jp..
buy 'stuff'
tmr watch movie(:

2009-07-23T19:36:00.004+08:00

Back updating! haha..
sum ppl ask me update n here i am ..
i love todae...first when class then loiter..
got prezzie..hehe..
ntg interesting during lesson..
except tat i step on Ms Ang foot..
not on purpose..wan go out cafe..was eating n drinking..
suddenly she came in..then throw n in a rush i went out..sori..
CAn't believe tmr got vb..yay!at last..
Thx to those hu gave me present todae..
including bdae cards n wishes..
n Mandy thx yaa!!!(:
special thx to afi, melissa, kay , desiree n my beloved 1E2 for e bdae song b4 eng class..
was a bit paiseii at tat time..haha..
went mac as dhiri wan treat me..thx!
then loiter at wm wif jialei , desiree [my best mummy, hehe] , melissa n glenna..
melissa n glenna went back at bout 3+..
lest desiree n jialei..was so engross reading books..
jialei funny..he wan borrow book..but e 'ting' i tink machine cannot read..
when he came back , he say i "poke2 in cannot lei"
should see e way he tok..haha..
thx everyone for making my day todae happy!!!!
Oh ya, not forgetting..
eh to hu tat bastard hu told ur cher bout me n shahirah...
better FUCK off luh! hu r u sia..
wan interfere..
u not happy wif wat i done to her or wat??
i not scared luh wif any1..
at most counselling??suspend??wateva luh..
JUST FUCK OFF!

2009-07-21T16:15:00.002+08:00

todae ntg happen at all..
jae not cuming school for 4 daes..
her bdae day same as me n she not cuming..haiz..
hope on sat she can go out..
oh ya, to those hu wan go out wif me on sat??
txt ,me yaa..probably watching either harry potter or obsessed[dunno can not] at lot 1 ..
idk wat time..now melissa, glenna, aishah, emelia , n i tink billie going..
e more e merrier..
hope pass my geo test just now i took..
i dun even know wats going on lor 4 geo honestly..

Tmr 'he' cuming back school after 10 days at home;D
To afi: get well soon yaa..hope to c u soon(:
n good luck 4 wateva O level paper u sitting for soon...
To melissa:hey gal, u still haven't found ur Ipod ah?
u put in ur pocket rite?
when u sit or anyting got feel anyting drop..
hope u got ur ipod back asap..

2009-07-20T17:28:00.003+08:00

todae ntg interesting except during recess..
went to canteen to eat..
then to cafe..sumting really really funny happen sia..
tink yousoff[not sure how spell]n frens disturb 1 guy..
wah, i really pity tat guy..when they all disturb him, was laughing non-stop..
dun know whether to laugh or not...i was e one at first they so call disturb then melissa
like kena drag in sey..sad..
hahaha..enjoy only during recess time lor ;D
wed dunno got cca..if got oso onli 1 hr sia..
1 hr do wat??play ball only ah...
but nvm, 1 hr oso 1hr la..rather than dun have sey...

Oh ya to those hu got e msg bout e old granny rite..
e 1 selling 'keropok'..its real sia i tink..
my grandma fren kena already..
then e whole house kena swept..scary siol!!!
now i scared..hehe..

2009-07-17T18:56:00.002+08:00

all boys r e same..
they do not mean wat they say..
but not all r like tat according to sum ppl,
but not to me...

2009-07-16T11:25:00.005+08:00

todae neva go school..
reason because cause lazy & sick..
&& oso because i've been crying from yesterday nite..
almost every nite..
its because of ppl around me & him..
argh! now i can't tok to sum1 i usually tok to..
c, after one another prob.. fcuk sia _1_
won't be online tat much cause no mood..
Ntg much to post..

I once ask u if u really love me, n u said ya..
but is it true??
my bro keep asking me to break up wif u if u still keep on like tis..
u know wat i said?
i said tat i will neva leave u..
but is tis how u repay me?
Call u yesterday u reject..
thx a lot 4 wat u give me all tis time..

2009-07-15T13:27:00.002+08:00

todae was so not good..
tok to e ******* tis morning..
U wan talk bout me, talk in front of me,,
dun b a coward n talk behind me..
u dunno wat i'm capable of doing..so dun try me..
not happy, meet me ah..I not scared wif a ******* like u!
*skip*suddenly having bad stomache just b4 recess..
went to canteen but end up went to cafe..
Thx wei chen 4 helping us to avoid from "them"..
after recess, eng..i kept saying i want go home cause can't take it already..
cried..haha..its not cry la, tears drop..
hate geo lesson..lie my head on e table..then cher say wan sleep go general office..
Fuck la I wasn't sleeping..

Happy Bdae to Sean!
Hope wat u wish 4 on ur bdae todae will cum true..
I miss my dear a lot...
hope he get well soon n cum schl..
sori yesterday didn't call u...
u angry ah? sori ...

2009-07-13T17:18:00.004+08:00

start off e day wif math..1st period can't concentrate..
cher ask me go toilet wash my face, me sleepy..2nd period dun know
wat got into me..i could concentrate..even its quite late ah..
learnt number sequences..getting a hang of it..
shit!i hope tis wed can do e math test..nxt tues got geo test chap 1-3..
still must stayback after school to do..haiyo..
lit, geo n ve boring..Ve is like scolding time just now lor..
after school went to Lot 1..pierce my top right..but its kinda like in middle like tat..but ok to me..
now pain2..then lepak2 wif my fren..went to mini toons..
fren took 1 swit, u know e 1 where must take ourself tat one, ya lor at there ah..
then got 1 guy suspect we take..told e person..I saw n i understand wat they saying in chinese..Lol..
e person kept looking at me n say back to e person tat told her ntg oso they take..
then i tink e guy like paiseii then walk off..HAHA!
fcuk sia..my hp sent for repair so long still haven't ready..

Just wanna tell u guys..
i dun like any1 else except for my dear k..
so ya, if u like/love me, so sorry u have to wait..
[n tat if u willing ah, hahaha]
N idk how long me n him will last..
So if u wan me or him, c if we r willing to let each other go..
i dun tink so.. =P

2009-07-12T20:34:00.004+08:00

[Me n wani, bestie 4eva]
went to do project at bout 2.30..
must do by todae n submit b4 11.59pm to ust if not degraded by 10 marks sia..
first wanted to do at wani mph, but then no internet connection..
so, went to imm mc..
log in then start using..
got a group of bois kept disturbing us[idk them], scold them bastard =X
find plug cause laptop batt finishing..
stupid, e ting can't go in..
went back to wani house n did e project there..
I adore her sis..pretty n clever(:
Soon finishing Project, yay!
My dear not cuming 4 10 days, he say his fever bad..
Get well soon yaa(:

How could i end tis feeling?
Tis feeling is irresistable..
but do u know it?
I really love u..
Until i could not even find a word to describe..

2009-07-10T13:32:00.003+08:00

shall say todae is very ok!
but not when mgl buddy luike to me..was like FCUK sia!
a nerd wif a u know..reason because cher ask him to look out if i use phone or not...
chibaii sia..
smack syazwan a lot of times..haha..
mt , sci n eng boring..
recess was fun shall say..
eat n drink outside cafe..pour a little water from 4th floor to 1st floor..
kena 1 person..escape..
but i love music, which was after recess..it rox man..
learn bout cha cha dance..at first was like "huh"
but then after u get e steps, its easy...love it..
but still like slow dance..then cher wan call sum1 to help demonstrate together wif her i tink..
guess waT? cher call me sia..then she ask me give my hand, ask 4 wat..
end up i oso give but was laughing non-stop..
sum ppl said , "Les"..lol..
wan go lepak2 n do usual stuff , tats y updating early , guess won't b online..

All of the pain is killing me ,
i wish i could drain tis pain ,
but its always e same ,
nothing ever gonna change ,
no matter how hard i try ,
i just can't stop loving u !

2009-07-09T14:49:00.003+08:00

went school as normal..
saw him a lot of times but he neva..
yesterday made a bet..nxt week if he see me, must say hi n other tings..
if he lose, hes a loser n..haha..
got math..cher gave us a pre-test..omg!
idk how do a lot of e qns sia..
must buck up liao on number sequences..
then pe play softball[i tink]..
sci super boring until i sleep..
cher saw n woke me up..argh!was happily sleeping..
eng ok2..mt same as sci..
then off home..
gtg, wan go lepak n *****..hehe..

[Edited]
mt was fun shall say..
study as usual..
suddenly hamizan went to e washroom..
came back , gave cher e exit pass..
suddenly i went "Hamizan , tak zip seluar!"
it means tat he neva zip pants..
hahahaha..me, nhita n e rest was laughing like hell even cher..
then cher was like dun nid say in front of any1 rite..4get wat i ans..
u know how i saw?
e time when he wan to give e exit pass to cher , i saw his zip ting down instead of up..
n at time time oso was looking at whiteboard direction where i was copying sumting , e place where hamizan gave e exit pass..FUNNy sia..

Is ur love true for me ?
Or is it just a play u bet wif ur fren .
y did i saw u walking behind her ?
Do u know i was fcukin jealous .
I really love u but wat u give me in return ?
ntg . u call me n i ans it .
but when i txt u , u seldom reply .
Does tis mean i have to end our relationship ?

2009-07-08T13:55:00.002+08:00

I totally hate todae..went school wearing home clothes cause going out after tat..
then got youth day celebtation...then he..
neva bring apron cause bookshop no stock..lucky teacher neva scold tat much..
then eng, mt n off home..
Thx to my Bestie for telling me sumting..

To Shahirah:
Hey..I know wat u say la asshole!
fcuk sia u..fyi, i didn't play other ppl heart..wat make u ting tat i play other ppl heart?
when i heard tat, was damn furious..
u r lucky i neva whack u up..if not..u know la..
u r going to get it..I will neva let u go just like tat..

To another Person:
Eh, wat u want ah?
u wan her to be away from me ah?
ok..can..i oso tired of her already..
i still got lots of frens out there other than u..
dun give me 1 kind of look in class..
n u know i fcukin hate it..
talk2 like nobody business ah...
nabeii la u!

2009-07-07T15:15:00.005+08:00

[Using e old skin back]

yesterday went out wif melissa to watch transformer..
love it sia..y everyone love megan fox ah? haha..
i tink..i know shes hot..
today school was ok i shall say...
science got lizard..y ah a lot of ppl scared of lizard..
look at our size n e lizard size, way diff man..haiyo..
nvm..nxt time april fool i go buy lizard n scared sum of u gals..haha..
i was like sitting there so relax then stupid gals shouting like no1 business..
jerrold sum more pro..go n smack e lizard until e body n tail kena separated..
recess time benson was like talking melissa lor..
saw 'him' dunno how many times..hehe..
todae if i not wrong they got tournament..gd luck yaa...
after recess, is lit, love it especially when Ms Chua take us..
after school got celebration cause tmr teacher not cuming...
tmr got youth day celebration...hmm..
i wonder wat those ppl will wear ah??

wat did i did wrong until u kept talking about me to her ah?
i kept quiet doesn't mean idk hor..
u r a fcuking *****[tis is e first time i'm calling other ppl ***** u know]
fyi, tis is not referring to melissa..
for those hu wan know y i put plaster on my forehead, ask me..
its not because of sumting scratch..its because of my fcuking sis...

2009-07-05T20:23:00.003+08:00

Thx to those hu tried to cheer me up todae..
including my bro..
i just can't stop crying now..sori..
i will confirm slash de...sori to those hu i break my promise..
father scold me, mum scold me..
wat happening to me? my father say my attitude change..
really ah?haiz..
wat they wan from me? not onli from my family but my frens n e others..
u wan me to die ah? i will...
u dun nid to tell me..b4 u tell me, i will make sure i die ok!!!
happy????!!!

2009-07-04T14:35:00.005+08:00

Back updating guys!
hmm..idk where to start..
ok..mayb a little bout yesterday..
quarrel wif melissa cause of sci project..i know it sound stupid..
but u all just dun understand..sad..
cried from bout 6+ to 7+..cher saw then ask me go out..
kept asking me y..dun wan say...vp saw then tok to me..
tats when i told her everyting...after schl, cher say i must write report cause its like
involve vp..idk how to say...lol..
afta schl met my fren, ask her treat me n my fren 4 ear piercings again..haha..
but sumting happy oso happened to me nite time, i tink..
i'm no more single..haha..dun ask me hu my stead.. bluek!

To Passerby:
Wat u wan from me ah?
i admit tat i'm tired of u already..
just stop it n i'll stop k?
i'm trying to stop fighting already ok..
n its not tat i'm scared or wat..
so ya..
i tink i know hu u already..
even my bro said so..
reply at my tagboard..thx...

2009-07-02T15:54:00.005+08:00

today math went to lab 2 ..
learn bout speadtest ah?
dun remember...
wasn't concentrating at all..
was doing other stuff like going to friendster..
was because mr ong can't control our screen!haha..
then ms tham mouth big go tell him n keep lookin at my row..
*skip*then lit..
ms chua was fun man! got 2 teacher..she n mr huang..
played games..after 2 period of lit then eng then 1 period of lit again..
tis time mr huang take us..he a bit lame..or should i say a lot..
he really fcuk...if ms chua were there, i dun tink he dare do those kind of ting..
went back home..very2 sad because of sumting n kinda piss off..

wat did i do wrong until u gosip bout me ah?!
not happy ah?dun nid gosip la..
cum n confront me..
wan fight?after school ah..
i just hate it when u start talking to her n start laughing..
I'm not scared of u at all as u know..
i might have change to u..
yeah,i admit..i'm learning everyting from my bro..
n i'm not a coward like u ok!

2009-07-01T17:44:00.009+08:00

today went to YOG village where e AYG ppl stay i tink..
E place big sia n very nice..Walk around there wif e person in charge cause e security there is very tight..
took group photo at e ceremony place..
then play game..my group won sia..wif a total of 13 star..
got 1 bag..after tat debrief..e guy tat 1 very annoying sia..
went back, do survey n get our souvenir ..it was like idk wat..haha..
dun know how to say..on e bus muhaimin irritating siol..kept taking photo..
then went down e bus he oso take..haiyo..eat slow slow n went back to class..
Yay!ms tan neva cum but must do work..sad..i take e easy way out..copy lor...
i almost forget, tmr got lit 3 periods if i not wrong..
2 periods after recess n 1 more period at e end of school..
hope it will turn out fun(:

everydae i'm crying myself to sleep..
tinking of wat i did wrong to every1 especially to those i've hurt most..
i want to say sorry to them but will they forgive me??
i dun tink they will especially when i've hurt them until they could not take it..
n pls dun tink tat u urself is hurt..
cause i am now..i've enough of getting hurt n tired of it honestly...
u will neva know wat i'm feeling rite now when i just pretend to b happy n strong in school..

2009-06-30T14:58:00.004+08:00

Thx melissa 4 being there when i alwaes nid u..
ur advice r very useful to me(:
n i appreciate a lot!
u really is my bestie..
love u..
n if u got any prob or anyting, tell me k..
so it will lighter ur load n mayb i could give u advice(:

went to school wif riyaas..
he ah, yesterday scare me want kol my house at around 10.35 like tat i tink...
cause i wan overdose as i can't tahan already yesterday because theres 2 tings
tat happened wif e person i love most, as a bestie..
then i quickly told him i won't overdose..
but dunno if i won't but i sure will de..
i'm sori if i can't keep my promise..
its just tat i can't resist e temptation 4 sum of e tings i do...
reached school..
first period he..was looking forward to it actually..
e teacher was ok not like mr ong, boring until can sleep..haha..
*skip*after school wanted to mit haidah but then she say she tink she got dc
in her school, bukit batok sec..haiz..
nvm..looking forward to meeting u n e rest of e ex yhps one day..
sad..tmr got e village ting..wan go sci lesson cause going lab..
love it..especially when doing experiment..broke another boiling tube..
2nd time..haha..

Y must u betray me?
wat in e world did i eva told u sia?!
told u not to tell him but u still..
liar! should not trust u anymore..
u n ur innocent face..
i really dunno wat to say already )_:

2009-06-29T16:40:00.003+08:00

Today was first day of school after june holiday..
got caught by mdm zarina 4 my fringe n socks..but my socks can c wat!
stupid2 mgl change melissa seating in class sia..argh!
no longer can tok to her already..umm..
she put sam n jerrold behind n in front of me..like bodyguard sia..
she put me there oso because scared i use phone again..
eh, hello..i won't use my phone luh...nobody oso wan txt me..
so stop picking on me n others...haiyo..
so childish..haha..
Back home..
chatting wif my bestie, Fathoni..
telling him hu i love all tat since he same school mah..
ask him to ask e person sum qns..then he will txt me tmr..
wednesday going YG village..yah!can't wait to skip lesson..even though its onli two lesson i tink..but nvm..still have geo..stupid..teacher is ms tan...
dunno when literature..going to have hard time i guess..
sum more teacher is MS PATSY CHUA! I tot tat was not our teacher...
but wat to do...haiz..
gtg, dunno y now i crying n having a damn bad headache ):

2009-06-28T10:05:00.002+08:00

tmr school already sia..
haiz...bored..no training sum more 4 1 wk..
onli start on e 6 july..
I really love u..
how could u not realise?
do u realise or just pretending it..
i LOVE u, not like..
I've tried to forget u, but failed..
I guess i can neva b urs..
Life mean ntg to me w/o u..
u once play badminton wif me n my neighbour..
u disturbed me..n i found out from my neighbour x u like me..
i so call ignore u when i found out..
tat was because i was not ready to accept e fact yet..
but now i am..but do u oso accept e fact tat i love u?nt like..
i could just dream on 4 u to be mine..

2009-06-26T18:49:00.004+08:00

went to jrg regional library wif melissa..
at first wanted to do e sci ting,but then dun have e tings..
so end up didn't do..hmm..then we do hmwk..
onli like 1h onli..wth!so fast..
then when to wm..remembered sumting..
afi today watching transformer but dun know where..
so asked melissa helped me ask..
he watching at wm..at 1.45..
took mrt there..reached at round 1.30 like tat..
saw him..actually i..nvm..
ps, if u wan know..ask me directly(but tat depend on my mood)
walk around..decided to go home at 4.30 like tat..not so early..
went to eat at kfc..told her stories..was meant to b scary but then end up she laughing..haha..
good to c her laughters(:
went to timezone to take neoprints..
melissa didn't brought her timezone card neither me, mine wif my bro..haiz..
then she bought e paper one ah..
after tat walked around wm..dun know how many time..
first went to e washroom after buying water..
suddenly, got tis group of boys,around 4, pointed at us..
we just walked..i turn around n saw them..
obviously they stalking us..i ran..then melissa..
didn't know wat to do..up n down we went e escalator..
but they still there..
(saw nabil)then, i tink i asked melissa to msg afi..
can't believe i asked her to..went in e timezone again...
end up i ran out myself , melissa following me at e back , went down e escalator near e comic connection..saw afi n frens..ran towards e lift..they saw us..
ran outside e idk wat shop..haha..then afi came..
melissa tok to him..
then idk wat happened we managed to escape from them..
thx to afi(: i own u sumting..
went back hm..again, my mum scold me..
idk y sia..then i dun wan go home as my mum ask me enjoy..
dun get wat she saying..
end up i went home but i locked myself in my room trying diff alcohol,slashing but not overdosing..as i have promised sum1 tat i won't overdosed as i remembered..
till here, going to try more alcohol..

2009-06-24T20:02:00.006+08:00

tis is e cursed gal..

tis is e old lady pic..

today watched drag me to hell wif melissa..
damn fun sia.. all along i watch e show,most of the time i cover my eyes..
should c how i cover my eyes..funny funny funny(:
hmm..after e show, was laughing..the saw sum old lady walk past us, kept saying tat its e lady in e movie..haha..
will find e lady photo when i got time(:
I tink got it already...
my w595 spoilt again..haiz..now using w910i..but used to it already..
hehe..going do sci hmwk wif melissa tis fri at jrg regional library..
omg! can't believe it sia..monday school open already..correct not ah?

2009-06-22T12:52:00.004+08:00

Vb training today was a bit tough..
dun know how to say it..haha..
lucky today neva do diving..
enjoy my time wif e rest of e vb members especially melissa, hanisah n athirah(:
love u man..
hmm..thurs got training..tink coach wanna treat pizza n dun know wat ah...
sad, Kay can't cum cause she will b quarantine 4 7 days if i not wrong..
haiz..shahirah n joy dun know disapear go where..but good ah..haha...
argh!school start next wk if neva extend..still haven't finish my holiday assignments..
Still slacking..haha..hey guys, hope holiday extend yaa..
i really wan it to happen..
I really hate tat Andrew! i dun even know him n so fast he say he like me..
like wat e HELL! hes 20yrs..eww!dun like him at all lor..
i play wif him as my bro said..said tat i'm gonna stead today but its a lie lor..
haha..help me guys..got any suggestions?

2009-06-21T11:42:00.003+08:00

Back updating..like dunno wat to update lor..
hmm..can't wait to go n watch transformer on wed..but c how ah..
not confirm...
wan follow me?txt me k..
went to grandma house yesterday..was freaking boring..
so i txt ppl..a few onli reply..
no fun..hey guys,if u got ntg,txt me..
stupid sia..tues must go back school cause got briefing on home study assignments..
so sian..hmm..bored at home..can't wait to go to 1 of my bro's fren party tmr(:
dun tink its bdae party..

2009-06-18T13:11:00.005+08:00

Back from volleyball training..
tired..sumting happened during volleyball..
melisa forehead i tink bleeding cause hit by e idk wat la..
was bleeding like hell..
hope u get well soon(:
did pumping but not a lot ah..
then learn how to dive 4 e ball..
like swimming sia..haha..
did 5 1/2 sets..skip 1 set..shh..
shit! i tink nxt wk oso do again ah..argh!
after training went to mc to eat wif athirah,hanisah n amirah..
tok n tok..fun to tok wif them(:
just make an acc at facebook wif e help of my bro,damn bored at home(:
can't wait to go run wif my bestie, Syazwani..

2009-06-17T12:31:00.002+08:00

just woke up..haha..
mum was like shouting to me to wake up but i ignore her..
sori afi..i really apologise 4 wat happened tat day..
i was confused..because of sum reason..
I enjoy my time going out wif rose yesterday even though its just walking around at jp n bugis..
bout 1 black n red hp strap..
hmm..rose say tat youth day can wear home clothes but ,must pay $5..
plan to wear dress..haha..
u'll b shocked when i wear dress..jk2..
dun know wat wear..
update again nxt time..
gtg do eng hmwk(:

2009-06-16T10:19:00.002+08:00

Omg!guess wat happened yesterday..
sumting unexpected..i told afi to 4get me 4eva as i know tat he have sum1 in his heart already..idk whether its true or not but mayb it is..
he told me he can't but i'm sure he can..n if can,dun nid msg me already..
dun b surprise when u msg me, i ask hu u..because i mayb deleting ur contact from my phone..I've tried very hard to 4get u but i can't..weird..just fyi..
I hate her!u know hu i referring to..
yesterday helprd rose like give her advice
hope i enjoy my day out wf rose today(:

Back

2009-06-15T11:27:00.011+08:00

In e bus otw to batik showroom n choco factory...

I didn't dye my hair hor..in e hotel..

Missing sum1..hmm..

Fooling around in e shopping mall..

My fav jacket..

Eating my fav swit in e bus..

PInk vs black..haha..my name n sis name..

Hey guys..
at last i'm back(:
miss u all a lotz especially a group of ppl..
first day i alwaes wonder when wan go home,but when it cum to e last day,
it was how cum so fast..haha..

First day
Hmm..when to KL..E journey was damn long so slept in bus..
then e tour guide introduce themself..
reach at bout 7+ at e grand idk wat hotel..
went 4 dinner..
there is sumting funny tat i was laughing bout..
e place got a lot of gays..
haha..n bapuk oso..
tats all..

Second day
Woke up..shower then have breakfast at e restaurant i tink..
e manager was like kept looking at me like got prob like tat..
ah..4get it..
left wif e group at 10.30aam to sunway lagoon..
was damn fun..
went to e shopping mall to make my name..
After sunway lagoon,went to mines wonderland..
ride on e boat ride..i love it man..
fun!otw around e shopping mall n idk wat,got a group of boys was like pointing to me..i know sumting wrong..
but when i came back,thet were still there..was damn scared..
they said to each other lets follow e gals' boat(which was me)..
lucky e boat havent stop..still go 1 more round cause still got time..
lucky..went down after tat n round e shopping mall..
saw e guys but onli 4 of them..looked at me then i pretend i neva c..haha..
after mines wonderland,went to petaling street aka chinatown..
i bought adidas jacket.black n gold in colour..
my mum was like bargaining 4 e jacket from RM85 to RM25 i tink..cool rite..
n 3 t-shirt..
went back to hotel..rest..

Day 3
went to batik showroom n choco factory..
batik showroom was ok ah..e choco factory i love it..
e most interesting part is tat got durian choco..taste delicious..
after tat,went to perigi hang tuah at Malacca..
very boring..kept going to toilet..
then ate lunch n off back home..
at last back!(:

looking 4ward to tmr(:

2009-06-11T11:26:00.001+08:00

Sigh..
I'm going off tmr already..
gonna miss u guys..
oh ya, dun msg/call me(my phone) k..
will b back on sunday nite..
so anyting,msg me afta 11 on sunday..

2009-06-10T11:42:00.005+08:00

Cuz 4eva[Above photo]
My sis off to germany group photo(:

2 more days b4 going 4 holiday..
mayb going Malacca i guess..
gonna miss u guys!especially my bestie tat is close to me..
time flies very fast isn't it?
I fcuking hate wat happened yesterday nite..
u wan know?
i did not accidentally sent e msg to afi..
it was meant 4 my bro..
Now i still find my phone of no use!
Its not like last time where my phone means a lot to me n its useful..
*skip*i love tis part when he said he nid to reply sum1..
kind enough tat i didn't write e name..
If onli i could die today,everyting would normal today without me..

If onli she didn't come to my life,i tink life would b perfect 4 me..
I would not b hurt by her..Cry every nite because of her..
Tinking of stupid tings because of her..
Y must tis happen to me?
Idk if u know hu i'm referring to..
If u know,good 4 u(:

Bored! Mendak sia...

2009-06-09T13:32:00.003+08:00

1. Real Name: Nur Aqilah Binte NAzri
2. Nickname(s): Hmm..Not sure..mayb its qilah or aqiiler..
3. Age: Twelve. will be thirteen on 23 july
4. Horoscope: A LEO baby
5. Male or Female: Female
6. Elementary: I dont know .
7. Middle School: Yuhua Primary School
8. High School: Bukit View Secondary School.
9. College School: Not yet -.-
10. Hair colour: Black,a little brown n red<---my fren say
11. Long or Short: Short
12. Loud or Quiet: Loud [ only w friends ] Quiet , when kena scolded ! :D
13. Sweats or Jeans: Jeans
14. Phone or Camera: Phone , Cannot live without it!
15. Health Freak: ?
16. Drink or Smoke: Smoke , shh!me drink sumtime..
17. Do you have a crush on someone: Hmmphs ? I dont know , hees.
18. Eat or Drink: Die die , i choose both . Cann ? :D
19. Piercings: 1 on left, 3 on right (:
20. Tattoos: I dont need that .
21. Social or Anti-Social: Social .
22. Righty or lefty: Righty .
23. First piercing: Toodler.
24. First relationship: Primarytwo, damn young rite ?
25. First Best Friend: hmm..i 4get..mayb its syazwani:D
26. First Award: oops..i Forgotten.
27. First Kiss: From my parents obviously..
28. First Pet: Bird :D
29. First Big Vacation: IDK .
30. First Love At First Sight: No need to ans this luhh .
31. First Big Birthday: When im still a kid .
32. First Surgery: I 4get .Long time ago .
33. First sport you joined: Volleyball,tis yr .Hmm,i tink its running-athletics like tat(private)
34. Orange or Apple juice: Apple Juice .
35. Rock or Rap: Both oso can(:
36. Country or Screamo: Both .
37. NSYNC or Backstreet boys: Depend ah..
38.Britney Spears or Christina Aguilera: Christina Aguilera .
39. Night or Day: Day .
40. Sun or Moon: Moon .
41. TV or Internet: Internet .
42. Playstation or xbox: Xbox duhh..
43. Kiss or hug: Both, especially but sum1 i love most :D
44. Iguana or turtle: Turtle
45. Spider or bee: Bee. no wonder got e show Akeelah n e Bee. Haha
46. Fall or spring: Spring .
47. Limewire or iTunes: iTunes ?
48. Soccer or baseball: Soccer!
49. Eating: Normal i guess.. But when damn hungry,eat like pig..
50. Drinking: Alot..
51. Excitement level: 65 %<--4 now
52. I’m about to: watch tv . no1 msg me .sigh...
53. Listening to: White horse<---By Taylor Swift
54. Plan for today: Eat . Shit . Sleep .
55. Waiting for: Someone to msg me!
56. Energy Level: 45/50 .
57. Thinking of someone: Sumtimes :D
58. Want kids? : ??? .
.59. Want to get married?: Must wait ah(:
60. When? : when i finish my studies luh.. -.-
61. How many kids do you want: Maybe one or two . Lols.
62. Any name on the mind: Hmm , i dont know . Hees
63. What did you want to be when you were little : I dont know .
64. Careers in mind: Hmphh , don't know either .
65. Mellow future or wild: ?
66. Something you would never try: DUn ask me, ask my bro
67. When do you want to die: hard to ans, u'll know soon ! -.-
68. Lips or Eyes: Both.
69. Romantic or Funny?: Both .
70. Shorter or Taller?: I want grow taller can ?
71. Protective or Caring?: Both ?
72. Romantic or Spontaneous?: Romantic .
73. Nice Stomach or Nice Arms?: How i know ?
74. Sensitive or Loud?: Loud, at sum times sensitive :D
75. Hook-up or Relationship?: Relationship .
76. Trouble Maker or Hesitant?: No idea .
77. Muscular or normal: Normal .
78. Kissed a stranger: got once, by 1 of my bro fren(stranger oso rite?) -.-
79. Broken a bone: Never broken . Sprain have :D
80. Lost glasses or contacts: Not sure .
81. Ran away from home: I wish i could .
82. Held a gun/knife for self defence: Knife no, penknife sumtime . I fight 4 self defence . sum know tat i'm i silat .haha :D
83. Killed somebody: Neva .But soon
84. Broken someone’s heart: I did!
85. Had your heart broken: Yes ,many times
86. Been arrested: Of course neva luh .
87. Cried when someone died: Obviously .But depend hu die ,
88. Liked a friend more than a friend: Ohh . yup .
89. Do you believe in yourself: Sumtimes
90. Miracles: Hope so .
91. Love at first sight: Depends .
92. Heaven: I hope there is one ! :DDD
93. Santa Claus: Diedie , wait long long .
94. Tooth Fairy: lol
95. Kiss in the first date: Yup(:
96. Angels: Do they even exist ?
97. Is there 1 person you want to be with right now?: Yes , Maybe No .
98. Are you seriously happy with where you’re in life now?: Sometimes yes , sometimes no .
99. Do you believe in God?: YES la.
100. Post as 100 truths and tag 10 people: just copy n edit(: